Kirby's Epic (Yawn?) Review

Every once in a while, a Nintendo franchise will attempt to reinvent itself and try to do something different. Sometimes (like in the case of Super Mario Galaxy), the change is for the better. Other times (like Yoshi's Story), the change is most definitely for the worse. Unfortunately, Kirby's Epic Yarn is closer to the latter.

Kirby's first outing on the Wii tosses away all gameplay mechanics that would be familiar to players of other Kirby games, and instead opts for something entirely new. This is because - like Star Fox Adventures: Dinosaur Planet on the GameCube - Kirby's Epic Yarn was originally designed as new IP, but had Nintendo franchise characters "tacked on" later in the development process. According to Iwata Asks, the game's original title was Fluff's Yarn, and starred the character Prince Fluff as opposed to Kirby. Fluff still has a large role in this game - both in the story and as the second player character in co-op mode.

It is difficult to discuss Kirby's Epic Yarn without discussing Yoshi's Story on the N64. Both games use similar patchwork graphics, a picture-book story motif, and contain similar surgical alterations to gameplay in order to promote simplicity (at the cost of possibly alienating long-time fans). In the case of Yoshi's Story, the power-ups, vehicles, most levels and bosses, and egg ricochet shenanigans from Yoshi's Island were removed. Kirby's Epic Yarn removes all of Kirby's flight, suction, and skill-stealing powers and replaces them with a yarn whip, 2-player co-op, and vehicle transformations. In other words, the game removes every gameplay convention associated with any game starring Kirby. The story sequences are done in picture-book style, and they are narrated by a guy who sounds like he's reading to a bunch of seven-year-olds. The game just feels "different", and not in the good way.

Oh, and you can't die. Ever.

Getting hit causes Kirby to lose a bunch of the "beads" he's collected throughout the level. In practice it's similar to getting hit in a Sonic The Hedgehog game and losing a bunch of rings - though Kirby STILL won't die if he is hit without any beads in his possession at all. In order to please the casual audience, Nintendo has managed to make the entire game feel like a "cheat mode". The bosses are very cool, but once I realized I couldn't die, it sapped all the fun out of fighting them. Sure, there are rewards for not getting hit and losing your "beads", but you most likely won't feel the need to seek them out. I can't help but feel like this game was designed exclusively for children. As a hardcore Nintendo fan, I just couldn't get into it - even with the "winks and nods" placed into the game for long-time fans of Kirby.

There are some good points, though. First and foremost, the game is gorgeous. The "world of yarn" springs to life, with different kinds of thread, patchwork, and cotton combining to frame Kirby's world in a way it has never been seen before. This is a technical marvel and one of the few games on Wii where jaggies are a complete non-issue (even on high definition TVs). The game relies heavily on use of 2D and only appears to use polygons when forming the yarn itself.

Also, although the gameplay is not going to be familiar to Kirby fans, that does not mean there isn't a variety of things to do. Quite often, Kirby will morph into different vehicles - a tank, a race car, a fire engine (controllable with Wii remote), even a UFO. These bits of gameplay were some of my favorites, as they show a lot of unrealized potential. One of the few things that kept me progressing through the game was to discover what kind of goofy vehicle transformation would happen in the next level. There are also some minigames and an "apartment customization" feature that allows placement of objects found in the levels into an empty space, but nothing too substantial. The game controls well-enough and does not require the use of the Nunchuck or Classic Controller. Waggle is very limited - which is a good thing. The co-op mode is also fun and does inject entertainment into some of the less exciting sections of the game.

Overall, Kirby's Epic Yarn isn't bad - it's just not that good, either. It's a kids' platformer with great graphics and a story set in the Kirby universe.

But a Kirby game, it is not.

Interview With A Casual: Facebook Games And Who Plays Them

Before Kombo took a nosedive, I was working on a set of articles for the site regarding an unusually bad PS3 fighting game, a review of a different game being released this week, and a set of interviews I did with a few active "social gamers" outside of what we would consider the hardcore gaming community. I will be posting these articles over the next few days after finding out via Google Analytics that despite a dearth of comments, people actually read the stuff I post here.

Without further ado, here is Interview with a Casual.



According to Gigaom, the average age of a "social gamer" is now a 43-year-old woman. And they outnumber us. Substantially.

The study was sponsored by PopCap, makers of casual crossover hits like Bejeweled, Peggle, and Plants Versus Zombies. The study polled the habits of players of "social online games" - games contained in social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace. These games are generally far from self-contained and use the features of social networking sites to acquire a larger player base. And in many cases, it works.

I interviewed two habitual social gamers, both friends of mine through mutual participation in community theatre. Both are wonderful people, dedicated moms, and come from different backgrounds outside of the usual hardcore gaming population. Both gave some very interesting answers about their social gaming habits. Let's call them "Pat" and "Sally".

Gaijin: What got you involved with Facebook games (was it viewing a friend's profile, hearing about it from someone in real life, etc.)? How do you choose which games to spend time on?

Pat: After many requests by friends to jump on games and help them, I visited a friend who showed me Farmtown. To help them, I started playing the game.

Sally: Friends sent me gifts and requests.

Gaijin: How many hours per week do you play Facebook games?

Pat: 10 to 14 hours a week. I play more often when starting a new game to get the game established. Now as timed tasks are involved I check in every eight to ten hours.

Sally: 15 minutes to 10 hours a week, depending on my level of boredom. I usually play early in the morning or late at night when I can't sleep but dont want to be doing things that would keep others awake.

Gaijin: What is your favorite Facebook game?

Pat: FrontierVille is my current favorite. I like to start a game and go in to first place, then it loses interest. FarmTown is another favorite as I have made friends all over the world and we communicate, usually about our favorite football team on the weekends (much bragging and teasing).

Sally: FarmTown, because you can interact with others.

Gaijin: Have you ever spent real money on items in a Facebook game? If so, did you regret the purchase? (note: "hardcore" gamers often have to purchase DLC, or downloadable content, after a game's release in order to unlock all the features on a disc that was purchased for Xbox or PlayStation consoles) If this question is too personal, you can simply say "no comment".

Pat: I have not spent a dime. I was tempted once to quicken the game, but never did and never will.

Sally: Never spent money and never will.

Gaijin: Have your experiences with social games on Facebook lead to other experiences gaming on PC or consoles? If so, what games have you played?

Pat: I recently dusted off Dr. Mario on the original Nintendo system and had an evening of laughter with an old girlfriend having Mario wars.

Sally: No.

Gaijin: Do you or your family own a Wii? Do you play it often?

Pat: Yes, my son has a Wii. He recently lost the laser and it doesn't work anymore. I used to play WiiSports with him, but because I have vertigo, most games make me ill.

Sally: I don't have any game consoles. My older son has had all of them, but never bought any of them, except his Wii. The rest were handed down.

Gaijin: Do any of your friends in real life play the same Facebook games?

Pat: I have actually connected with old friends over these games and have friends who have made second and third Facebook accounts to further themselves in the games.

Sally: I only play games my friends do. I don't accept/friend/play with people I don't know or that my friends don't know personally. For instance I have my cousin's sister-in-law and my cousin's close friends as friends in social games.

Gaijin: Have you met new friends or acquaintances through Facebook games?

Pat: Yes, we are communicating with a couple in London who garden and own an allotment. They have even invited us over. We sit on Skype and chat two times a month or so. They have sent chocolate from Europe to us and we have sent them beef jerky, something they like from the United States. I also speak to a gentlemen from England and have a great friendship.

Sally: I talk to and meet people from all over the world in Farmtown. I enjoy interacting with these people. I do not accept them as friends, as I worry about hackers and identity theft.

Gaijin: What is your favorite part about playing these games (can be general, or game-specific, i.e. "I enjoy adding items to my farm and interacting with my friends")

Pat: I am very competitive, so, it's nice to get to first place. When you get into the upper levels you find much conversation, laughter and "dirty dog" comments. Some of the games remind me of gambling. How to "Win" and be first, without spending money. A great diversion to life, and it's FREE.

Sally: Playing competitively. I enjoy making lots and lots of money. Even if it's fake...

Thanks to "Pat" and "Sally" for taking time to interview with me. I think their responses are very telling as to the kinds of efforts publishers are going to use to recruit the new generation of social gamers. I also think the responses on the DLC question were very telling. Hardcore gamers are rarely seen as a patient group - with exploits, farming cheats, etc. being discovered daily to pad trophy counts, gamerscores, and online rankings. Social gamers do spend a good deal of money on DLC - but there are also social gamers that publishers are going to have to work a little harder at courting in order to get them to part with their dollars for digital content.

Incidentally, after doing the interview, "Pat" and "Sally" connected on Facebook and began gaming together. It truly is a new world we live in.

The Return...

So I'm back, after a brief flirtation with bigger things in game journalism. The last few weeks have been full of highs and lows. I have every weekend of October booked with awesome Halloween events. I got to play Marvel Vs. Capcom 3. I was able to publish a piece calling attention to the lack of Tales series localizations in the West. Work is going better than usual.

But as I type this, I sit here with a sprained hand from a gym workout. I drove to Chicago and took time off of work to get an exclusive for the gaming site which shut down the very day I was traveling. One of my arcade cabinets died this week (though I did manage to sell another one for proceeds to put towards a new board), and I'm going to get started with rehearsals soon for both murder mystery and a christmas show for the local community theatre, so I will have no shortage of things to do.

I'm still not quite sure where to go from here. I may open a site that has the potential to gain a few more followers - but I'm really unsure which direction I want to take it. I have so many side projects and barely have any time to put towards them. In the meantime, there will be some fairly interesting stuff here - including day-one reviews of a few upcoming games on certain Japanese consoles, so watch this space.

Epic 5: 関西

This weekend was a tour to the Kansai region. I originally had plans to travel to Osaka with some friends, but one of those friends had financial issues with the bank back in the States (issues I understand completely, as I will document below >.<), so I decided to sign up for the tour instead. Yamasa tours are a lot of fun, and you get to see a lot of stuff, but they're very draining and very hectic. Sacrificing freedom and your own schedule does get you a steep discount on travel costs and meals, and they will take you places that would be very difficult (and expensive) to reach on your own via taxi or obscure train route. This particular one started off on the wrong foot, as I had to commute from my host family's house to the pickup point in the pouring rain. I also had not received my confirmation voucher at this time, so I was actually rather freaked out wondering whether or not they'll even come by to pick me up. Colin did eventually show up with the van courtesy of Declan, and we were off.

Fortunately, unlike the last tour, everyone coming along this time was a native English speaker which made communication both easy and relaxing as for once I didn't have to worry about the "JP Onry" rule that pretty much runs my life at this point between school rules and the fact that Japanese really is the only shared language among many of the students here. I don't know Chinese (more than 60% of the students here seem to speak it as a native language), so there's no other way to communicate. I certainly write more English than I speak on a daily basis - which is conductive to the learning environment I suppose, but can be extremely demoralizing at times. It tends to make one feel more isolated than one would normally feel in a country where you are already a minority (and in some cases a freak show). It's something you get used to but can shellshock you on occasion if you're not ready for it. I know enough Japanese to be able to communicate what I need to in a wide variety of situations, so it's not really a problem, but it still can be intimidating at times.

Our first stop was the rain-soaked Sekigahara region, marking the location of the Battle of Sekigahara in 1600. The battlefield itself wasn't much to see, but a lot happened here. This battle was a huge turning point in what would be one of the longest running and most famous shogunates of Japan - the Tokugawa Shogunate. As I learned from one of the guides, Tokugawa Ieyasu, winner of Sekigahara and first shogun of the Tokugawa line, really does not have a good reputation amongst many Japanese. He was viewed as a "schemer", someone who hung back until the opportunity arose for him to take power. In reality, he actually kept promises to those who served him, and there were many men willing to fight to the death for him because of it.

The rain kept us from enjoying the misty mountain views atop the battlefield site for long, but we did get to hear the entire story of the battle in English in the museum down the road. One thing about Japanese museums - even if there are no signs anywhere that say it, don't pull out your camera. Apparently there is an unspoken rule that picture taking in museums is forbidden. I found this out the hard way when a little Japanese lady working for the museum came running up to me with her arms crossed in the "batsu" symbol, glaring at my camera and apologizing but still insisting that the camera gets put away. I put it away but was still irked enough to not buy any souvenirs at the place. Everyone else was smart and used their phones, which were a little less obvious than my digital camera.

We then stopped at a few more temples and had lunch along the banks of a river in Kyoto. One of the guides mentioned that Nintendo headquarters was right down the street and I suddenly realized what Shigeru Miyamoto (the man who created Mario) meant when he said in an interview that he could bike to work every day. The place is just gorgeous. Mountain scenery, non-crowded roads lined with shops and restaurants, and lots of riverboats - some restaurants themselves. It didn't really seem like a rich area, but a peaceful one. An area reeking of tradition and begging to be explored fully. Seeing the scenery around here made it really obvious to me how someone growing up in an area like this could get inspired creatively.

But we weren't here for Miyamoto. We were here for Murasaki (Shikibu), author of The Tale of Genji. Apparently ten chapters of the novel, the English translation of which I read back in college, took place at one of the temples around the gorgeous river-street. I don't remember much about The Tale of Genji but I do remember it was really messed up. Actually, most of the historical and contemporary stories I read for my Japanese Literature class were really messed up, but I could write a whole blog entry just on that topic. The temple was certainly interesting to see, but a lot of the temples are starting to blend together at this point and it's getting hard to remember exactly what happened where.

Our last stop before heading into town was Ishiyama temple, where The Tale of Genji was (allegedly) written. They even have a little animatronic Murasaki Shikibu writing away in a little corner of the temple where the book was supposedly written. Personally, while I recognize the literal significance of that novel, I found it a little odd and off-putting to have a robot at a Buddhist temple. It just seemed too "touristy" for me.

One other thing I learned here, which is something relatively fascinating, is that the koi in a lot of the temple ponds have an average lifespan of 180 years. The biggest problem for them is skin cancer, which is why they try to keep the ponds shaded in a lot of areas. I had no idea a fish could live that long - particularly if it's fed as well as the temple koi are. You learn something new every day.

In Kyoto we had delicious yakitori at a small place down an alley in the Gion district (a.k.a. World Geisha Headquarters) and explored the surroundings. I had a very interesting conversation with one of the guys who does a lot of the staffing for Yamasa about organizational problems that can occur when developing software, and realized I'm more knowledgeable than I feel most days at my job, and yes, that is a good thing. We had drinks at a couple more places and saw a shrine to Susano-oh (my favorite character of Japanese mythology) lit up at night before returning to the hotel - which was fully Japanese style, a separate futon on the floor for each person, and VERY comfortable. The guys were all in one room and all the girls in another, so unfortunately I had to deal with snores coming from both sides, but at that point I was so exhausted that I really stopped caring.

The next day was Ninna-ji garden, a used kimono shop, and a nice (if unusual) Western-style breakfast where they managed to ruin the bacon by smothering it in ketchup, along with the breakfast sausage. Okay, fine, if you're going to ruin something, ruin the sausage, but leave the bacon well enough alone. It doesn't need your help, thank you.

Osaka was far away, and by the time we got there we didn't have a lot of time to eat. One of the guides picked out a tempura place and then proceeded to order tons and tons of raw seafood, which was very hit or miss. Some of it was delicious, some was edible but barely, and some of it was just bizarre - like slimy, whole mini squid or some kind of drink made of kombu. The other guide and I were both relatively irked that we went to a tempura bar and almost no tempura was ordered by the time we left. I was mad enough that I decided to buy some takoyaki at the nearest takoyaki stand on our way back to the car. Osaka is famous for takoyaki which is - for the uninformed - little balls of savory dough seared golden brown with generous pieces of cooked octopus on the inside. I know how weird it sounds to other Americans, but octopus is actually not that bad and is one of the few seafoods that doesn't taste fishy at all.

Ordering street food creates a problem, and it's one that we take for granted in the States. Despite how clean Japan is, they really don't have many garbage cans around that aren't for businesses only. And so, when you order a messy food like takoyaki and then have a piece of takeout garbage oozing with onions and sauce, there's no place to throw it out. With drinks it's not really a problem as you can just put the bottle away until you find a place to put it, but drippy, messy food containers are a huge pain in the neck. I couldn't throw out the takoyaki wrapper until arriving at a rest stop about 40 minutes after getting on the road back to Okazaki, stinking up the car in the process.

Interlude 5: Byouki

So yes, I'm aware I haven't written for quite some time again. But I have a very, VERY good reason. For the last few days, I've been fighting off the most egregious case of food poisoning I've ever had. For those people ever planning on traveling abroad, let me explain that food poisoning in an unfamiliar country is one of the most torturous experiences one can encounter during a trip. Multiply that torture a few dozen times if you have a daily commute that you have to make during your trip (as I do - 40 minutes of walking and up to an hour total depending on train times).

For me, the whole thing started with a seemingly innocent lunch bento. Homestay only includes breakfast and dinner, so you are still responsible for any food you want over lunch break at YAMASA. So, Tuesday I decide to go to my usual lunchtime spot - a nearby supermarket named DOMY. DOMY is, without equal, one of the cleanest looking supermarkets I have ever seen, in Japan or otherwise. Everything smells fresh and is well-organized. Unlike with most Japanese supermarkets, not a hint of fish scent oozes out of the seafood section. Therefore, I had no concerns whatsoever about eating lunch regularly there. For two weeks I had no problems eating lunch there daily, choosing a small pork cutlet and vegetarian sushi for lunch. Tuesday, however, I tried something different. I was feeling particularly stupid after class that day and noticed a gigantic chicken katsu (fried cutlet) on sale for 198 yen, served with cabbage. Being in a bad mood I decided to choose that unhealthy option (actually cheaper than my usual sushi choice) and then head back to school where I promptly consumed both the chicken and the cabbage.

Little did I know that there was something lurking within...

That very night it came back to haunt me with a vengeance. I'll remember this forever, because it was that very chicken katsu that managed to wake me up just in time for the Nintendo E3 conference stream at 1AM JST with the worst case of indigestion ever. Not being able to sleep, I decided to go ahead and watch the conference in hopes that something about the Wii Vitality Sensor would dull my senses and put me into a boredom-induced coma. Instead, I got to see the 3DS unveiled in its delicious 3D glory as my stomach turned cartwheels and bounced up and down inside my abdomen.

My next mistake was the next morning when, despite the fact I felt more or less like I had the flu, decided it would be a good idea to try and go to class. I managed to make the hellish commute - which hurt pretty much every step of the way as I struggled NOT to be the crazy huge sickly gaijin that puked all over traincar 4 on the Aichi Loop Line - and ended up in class clutching my stomach. I was able to endure about two periods worth of class (I had to stay as long as possible because there was a test the next day) and then couldn't hold on any longer. So it was back to the homestay via another long and painful commute. My host family was gravely worried, in particular when I woke up a few hours after returning home, briefly forgetting where I was, and began mumbling in English.. "I really needed to sleep..." My host mother panicked and asks me in Japanese if I needed to go to the hospital. I snapped out of it and replied that I was probably OK, as I had food poisoning in the US before too and it had a similar feeling to this. She was really confused when she asked what I ate that could have caused this, and I replied that it was DOMY's chicken katsu. I find out later that someone else from YAMASA had recently gotten food poisoning from a DOMY bento. Wish I would have known about that before.

A note if you get sick in Japan: you can't buy medicine at a grocery store. You have to go to a kusuri-ya (drugstore, like Walgreens) in order to get anything that will fix what ails you. Now here's the problem. I'm not feeling well. And I'm already feeling beaten to death over finding out just how little Japanese I actually DO know, even after studying it for so long... how the heck am I supposed to deal with this? Of course I can ask someone where something is at the store. The concern I was trying to ignore at the time was avoiding giving the kusuri-ya clerk a story to tell when this sickly looking gigantic gaijin comes plowing into his store meekly asking for geri-dome (anti-diarrheal agent). Yeah. Great. Eventually I sucked it up and got the medicine, thanks to my host mother pointing out exactly where the kusuri-ya closest to the house was located.

Today I am fully recovered and about 5 pounds lighter than before the food poisoning. Actually, none of my pants fit anymore. They've been gradually getting larger, but now they are all far too big. My next problem... where to find a gaijin-sized belt in Okazaki...........

Epic 4: 変な日本

So it has been a while since my last entry, and for that I apologize, but things have been moving fairly quickly ever since I moved in with the Hyoudou family. To me, it's just been one thing after another, slowly finding my way around the customs and expectations of the people in the household. In general, things are pretty laid back - everyone is very nice (except the kitty, which runs whenever she hears me moving around...makes me sad) and the food and conversation thus far has been quite wonderful. The biggest problem I encountered so far is figuring out how the shower works. I had a bit of a shellshock when I went into the bathroom to take a shower at 6AM only to find a traditional Japanese washbowl and faucet waiting for me. There was a showerhead too, but no matter what I tried, the damn thing wouldn't go on. I wasn't about to ask my host mother or anyone else how to use it （シャワーを使い方教えて下さい。。。）, so I improvised and washed up with the bowl and stool, 日本人 style. It was...weird.

Fortunately I discovered on the second day how the thing actually works. Next to the lever that controls the faucet there's a diagram that shows a picture of the shower head on the left, the kanji for "stop" in the middle, and a picture for the faucet on the right. Now even though I turned the faucet all the way to the left before, I failed to account for the fact that the "off" position is actually with the lever facing to the right. Once I figured this out, turning the faucet into the "up" position actually sent water to the showerhead.

It's very interesting talking with my host family because they are most certainly cultured even though rooted in Japanese tradition. They have multiple DS systems and are trying to practice English using them. Helping the daughter with spelling while she was using the English Trainer DS made me realize just how painful our language must be to people who are coming from a phonetic language (such as Japanese). Phonics, sounds like "th", "ck", "si", etc., don't make sense to them because every syllable in the Japanese language (with one exception) is a vowel-consonant pair. There are no "short" and "long" vowels in Japanese. An "a" will always sound like "ah", for example, not "ah" or "ey". Extended vowels (like our double "ee" or "ie", etc.) are always written the same way and sound the same way. Double consonants also give them trouble because it simply doesn't make sense phonetically.

It was interesting that the spelling mistakes they were making are pretty similar to the ones young kids make back in the states... "plees" for "please", for example.

Then again, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around some of the more complicated parts of the Japanese language, especially since this course is turning out to be a turbocharged version of my college course on Japanese linguistics. Japanese classes for 25 hours a week, most of which deals with exceptions that I never knew existed or only slightly understood the rules. This course is certainly building my vocabulary and giving me a stronger grammar base, but it's making me more hesitant to speak (at least in class, for fear of being completely wrong). It's something I need to get over, because as I've learned from the time with my host family, I can most certainly be understood. It's the teachers' job at Yamasa to tell us if our answer was not 100% grammatically correct.

I found an arcade fairly close to my host family's home, and I gather it may even be walking distance. So yes, finally, I have located a BlazBlue Continuum Shift machine if I ever need a fix. Fortunately the console version is due not too long from now, so I won't need it for much longer.

This weekend I went to Nagoya with some friends and may have extended travel plans. Next weekend we're planning to visit Osaka and the week after that, Tokyo (Disneyland) and a ryokan. One of my friends wants to try to get into the Ginza Vampire Cafe...we'll see how that goes...

A few weird things:

1.) Natto (a.k.a. fermented soybeans) which are apparently "good for your health" taste like nuts at first but the rancid aftertaste of something which has been partially fermented is a bit too strong for me.

2.) I tried Natsu Dango (summer) proving once again that mochi is evil, no matter how tasty the filling may be.

3.) Breakfast today, courtesy of my host mother: hot dogs. But not what you're expecting, oh no. One "hot dog" was made of breakfast sausage, ketchup, and lettuce on a bun. The other was a hard boiled egg and cucumber on a bun. Served with a side of soup and fresh kiwi. Weirdest breakfast I have ever had.

4.) Nagoya is home to one of Japan's finest creations: The Bacon Wrapped Onigiri. Yes it exists, and yes, it's as good as it sounds. A salted rice ball wrapped in a large layer of bacon seared over a charcoal grill, then basted in a sweet soy-glaze and topped with sesame seeds. Mmmmmm...heaven. Proof once again that bacon wins against all. We need to find a way to integrate bacon and sushi. Not raw bacon though.

Interlude 4: Kazoku

Well, I am happy to report that today's speaking test definitely seemed (note I'm saying SEEMED) to go better than the last ones. I blame my lack of familiarity with the testing procedure for my problems on the first speaking exam. Taking my time, thinking through each answer carefully, and then answering with the appropriate response worked a lot better this time around than blurting out the first thing that came to mind and hoping somehow the Shinto gods would turn it into competent Japanese. The one thing I dislike about this testing procedure is that it discourages creativity, and this is true for one very important reason:

They are evaluating your speaking ability, and the more you speak, the more mistakes you're gonna make.

Japanese people are raised on "cram and spitback" procedural exams, not on creative answers. So creatively answering a question and trying to speak more Japanese than required will only screw you over in the end. That's what class is for, not the tests. This makes sense when looking at things from a Japanese mindset and I probably should have anticipated something like that would occur.

I played hookie this afternoon (yeah, I know) in order to pack and prepare to move to my host family's house. Admittedly I was worried sick because I wasn't sure what I was getting myself into, how far away they would be from the school, what kind of commute I'd have to take to get there, etc... plus I wanted to make sure I didn't accidentally leave anything in the room. After packing up and getting picked up, I was moved into the host family's home, a few miles away from the school and a 10-minute ride by train.

The family is wonderful. The grandmother is very nice and seemed relieved that I could speak Japanese. According to her, the last student that was hosted by them could not speak a word of Japanese and didn't really want to use the stuff she was taught in class in order to communicate, instead relying on English and hand signs. I must look like a superstar to them.

The parents are both very nice. The mother is a housewife and the father works at Mitsubishi Motors. Pretty typical Japanese arrangement. They are in their early 40's and own what I think is a VERY nice house by Japanese standards. It's very tall, and each floor is relatively small in size (similar to the big game centers in Tokyo). Each floor has one or two rooms only and a small, narrow staircase leading to yet another floor. There are at least four floors in this place but I'm only going where I've been shown out of courtesy.

The 6-year-old daughter, though she appeared nervous when first meeting me, is not shy. Gaijin that are the size of Godzilla apparently don't scare her, as it only took me an hour of being here before she popped into my room with her fashion game on her DS and started talking to me. She is Japanese cuteness personified and I think I'm going to learn quite a bit of Japanese from just talking with her and the others in the house. I am told that the others that stayed here were mostly otaku, so I'm going to do my best to make sure that I leave a good impression of both Yamasa and Ameritaku (yes I just made that up and I'm keeping it) by the time I leave. I'm very much looking forward to what is going to be a life-changing experience for me.

はじめまして！　　＾＿＾

Interlude 3: Tanjyoubi x Shuumatsu

I haven't written in a while, mainly because I've been so busy. Thursday was my first exam and - although I did very well on the written portion - I bombed the speaking. I think it was a combination of not knowing what to expect and the sensei typing out everything I'm saying (including the interjections) on a laptop as she's asking me questions. I was so nervous that I drew a blank...similar to what I guess most people would call "stage fright" although I never get stage fright on stage... and couldn't speak. The garbage Japanese that blurted out of my mouth at that point was completely incorrect, and I felt very bad after exiting the testing room and realizing just how badly I probably did.

So not only did I have a lousy test on my birthday, but the following conversation in class was about Japanese funerals - how ironic. Though I really shouldn't beat myself up too much about that test, I feel that as a 4-year student I should have done better. The important thing is that I know what to expect in a speaking test now and will be fully prepared. The biggest clue I could have given myself ahead of time would be to relax, gather your thoughts, and then speak. Don't blurt out the first thing that comes to your mind.

In the evening some friends met me for dinner, and we went to Aeon and had some delicious tempura and played around in the game center for a while. Not a bad way to spend my first birthday in Japan.

On Friday we reviewed the ~ba form, which is fortunately something I'm quite familiar with. There are many more exceptions to using it then I remember, though. I know all those exceptions are going to be on the next test. I have come up with a new gameplan for handling the material here. Even though most of it is going to be review, the fact of the matter is I need to come to class prepared to speak it. Thus I will be spending the majority of my time each morning before class doing preparations for the day's class rather than reviewing the material from the class before. I think this will make me more effective.

This weekend we went to Okazaki Castle and the culture center, where there are free conversation classes in Japanese for foreigners on Saturdays and Sundays. We did conversation drills in this lesson that were very similar to the ones covered in class, but at a slower pace. I will be attending these lessons weekly. I also took a few pictures at a cosplay event held in that same culture center today. Cosplay in Japan isn't as crazy as most people would have you believe - it's about on par with the stuff here. There was a really decent Zero from Code Geass and a clown on stilts, along with the usual assortment of catgirls and lolis. This evening I'm doing some preparation for tomorrow's classes and watching a few episodes of Japanese action shows and dramas. It looks like rain so it doesn't seem like a nice evening for going out.

Epic 3: 強くなりたい

I have a lot to say and not a lot of time to say it. After my first day of class finished up, I was sort of dreading a long and uneventful weekend before things finally got rolling on Monday. However, things didn't quite end up that way. After returning to the student village I ran into a few people who I've seen around and was invited to go karaoke with them. I was admittedly quite thrilled because ever since the first night here I haven't really been out and about all that much - just going to school, grabbing dinner, and coming back home.

Although I totally stink, it was a lot of fun. This place is great. Far less expensive than the one in Shibuya that I went to before in Tokyo, and they actually give you all-you-can-drink soda and tea during your karaoke session. Yes, really. They also have special pricing where for approx. $20 per person you can karaoke as long as you want as long as at least one room is available to other guests.

I also signed up for a tour to Kobe and Nara which happened over the weekend. Although usually temples and shrines aren't necessarily my thing, I did want to make a return visit to Kobe, and plus an overnight trip sounded like a lot of fun. And it was. It really, really was.

The person who drove us around, Colin-sensei, is a cool guy. A former Yamasa student and now married to a teacher who is from the area, he is actually far past the "bitter gai(koku)jin" phase of living in Japan and had a lot of really good insight into Japan, its people, and its culture during the trip. He is also a huge Star Wars nerd and spent a lot of time debating semantics of the "extended universe" (known to the rest of us as 'the books') in terms of what is and is not technically canon material.

I couldn't remember the names of all the places we visited if it killed me, but there were some really cool highlights. And low-lights, I suppose.

Highlights:

1.) The temples we saw were absolutely gorgeous, including the one where Last Samurai Was filmed. That one required you to take a gondola up a mountain in order to access the grounds. How often do you get to see something like that? Not very often. Todaiji, too, which is self-explanatory. Largest wooden building in the world.

2.) The people that took the trip with me were all very cool. It was nice to get to know a couple of my non-English-speaking classmates a bit better as it lessens the "gap" between the chugokugo speakers and the eigo speakers.

3.) A crazy, tightrope-walking Japanese magician performing in the "foreigner district" square of Kobe. Now when I say "foreigner district" I mean the OLD foreigner district, where there are Western-style houses and embassies from hundreds of years ago that are now museums.

4.) Pasta in Japan that did not have ketchup on it, was actually tasty, and was Western-style.

5.) Rest stops in Japan are awesome and have better food than most sit-down places in the States. No I'm not kidding. They have just about everything you can think of, and it tastes really good.

6.) Talking to the locals in a pub in Himeji.

7.) Deducing enough from an all-kanji menu to order food and help other people order food gave me a huge high.

Lowlights:

1.) Making a wrong turn in Himeji when looking for somewhere to eat at night and ending up on what one person in the group called "Rape Road"...basically a seedy, dirty, grimy alleyway which seemed to have a lot of Gentlemen's Clubs and other businesses of questionable ethic...and sadly also the only place in the general area with any sort of restaurants at all. Both myself and the other American who went on the trip had a really bad feeling about the places we were walking, but the girls couldn't decide on a place to eat and chivalry dictates we stay with them until they do and just try to ignore the possible yakuza giving us the stink-eye from across the street.

2.) Getting poked and prodded in places by the locals in the pub in Himeji who were trying to compare sizes of hands, shoes, and yes, other stuff too. Once they reached into my personal space, I called it quits for the night and went back to the hotel. Apparently I was the only one that had this issue. They didn't bug Colin or Will. Just me. Grr.

3.) The hills of Kobe make your feet hurt. But at least it's good exercise.

4.) No matter how good the company, being stuck in a Japanese-designed minivan for 4-5 hours at a time is not comfortable.


After returning last night, I went to class today and had what was the single most intense Japanese lesson I have ever had. Most of it was review...actually the sensei pulled me aside after class to ask if I had seen the stuff before. Yes, actually everything covered in "Minna no Nihongo II", I most certainly have studied, and been tested on, before. The bigger problem is that because I haven't studied the language officially (just on my own time) for the past 5 years, my conversation is weak. Reading and comprehending is fine. The issue is with speaking. Fortunately, this program is specially designed to remedy that problem. I suppose it's nice that I don't have to worry about new grammar points, but the way they use joshi (particles) and continually test/attempt to trick you over and over again is going to drill the fundamentals into me. In a lot of ways it's going to make my Japanese much less sloppy.

The bad part about being in SC class though is that I don't get access to the chukyu stuff, like the "Nihongo Cafe" where you can interact with local residents. One of my biggest balks with this program is that although you're forced into using Japanese with other gaijin, there really isn't much ability to interact with native speakers other than class and at stores ... you know, buying stuff. You can only order food in so many different ways before you realize you're getting zero practice.

That's not to say the classes are bad or not worthwhile. I'm on the hunt for some programs that will allow me face time with some locals without sounding forced. I was really, really upset earlier today when I heard Nihongo Cafe wasn't open to SC, and I'm not here long enough to where testing into chukyu would matter (if I do all the modules, the test will happen right before I leave to return to Minnesota)... 無理. Hence my little outburst earlier.

I feel better now though. I do wish I would have retained more, but I am learning quite a bit. Doing the math, each day of classes here is equivalent to about a week of Japanese at college and that doesn't include the time speaking it outside of class or the fact that I'm going to be on a homestay in less than two weeks. This place truly is Japanese Boot Camp.

絶対に強くなれる！

Interlude 2: The Big Leagues

As I mentioned in my last note, I am currently in the city of Okazaki, Aichi preparing for my placement exams tomorrow. The first day at Yamasa has been a whirlwind - I've met a lot of people, moved into a dorm room, shown the general area, and relaxed at an izakaya. And then I woke up at 5AM this morning.

Today I spent a few hours studying, which I need to get back to shortly.

Apparently the school's definition of "intermediate" studies is between JLPT level 3 and 2 - basically where I want to be. Because of this, however, there is a chance that depending on the content of the placement test I may be finishing up beginner lessons. There are two sections of the test that worry me - first is keigo (a.k.a. polite and humble speech) and the second deals with the use of the Japanese passive voice, which is a bit in-depth to discuss here. I've reviewed both today and though I feel fairly confident I have no idea what to expect. I passed JLPT 3 with flying colors back in December, and I have no idea how many questions I need to answer correctly to pass this test. I do know that the format is similar to the JLPT which is a good thing as it means I've been studying the correct material.

Other than that, I spent the day exploring and wandering a bit, trying to figure out where things are. As such, I had a lot of time to myself today to think. Admittedly I used to complain about the hustle and bustle of Tokyo, but this place is altogether different and at this point I'm undecided on whether I like it more or less. Everything is spread out - requiring much more walking - and relying on English in a pinch is no longer an option. As far as trial-by-fire language experience is concerned, I'm in the big leagues now.

I suppose I am starting to feel a little homesick. I miss my girlfriend, and my cat. I've been in Japan for almost a full week now, and tomorrow classes begin. I'm meeting a lot of people but I'm still not sure who my "friends" will be, so the next few days are going to be very interesting. There is a certain "camaraderie" among the students here in that we all have a common interest though we may not even be able to converse outside of the Japanese language. I've met people from all over the world already, and I'd say about half of them don't speak a word of English. It makes this school very unique, though I will say you can only experience as much as you allow yourself to.

The other Americans I've met, save one, are a perfect example of the species as far as the rest of the world is concerned. These guys are boisterous and nonchalant. They don't even bother trying communicating with the other students in Japanese outside of class, and aren't really interested in learning anything at all. Considering how much I'm paying to be here and how much I'm trying to experience in a short time, every time one of these guys opens his mouth it makes me cringe. My guess? College kids, and their parents are most likely footing the bill for them to come here to "study".

But I'm not them, so I don't let it get to me. Tomorrow, it begins.

Epic 2: 外人クエスト

Apologies for the delay in writing the next entry, but I've been pushed and pulled from event to event and really haven't had a lot of time to think about anything. I am sitting here writing this entry IN OKAZAKI, having made the trip successfully from Tokyo. I am rather exhausted after three+ hours of train rides, too, and I have a tip that there's going to be a rather nasty honorific/humble conjugation portion of the placement exam on Thursday, so I really need to start reviewing that soon.

In the meantime, here's a recap of what happened over the last few days.

On Saturday, I met with my uncle's associates and they took me to Senso-ji temple in the Asakusa ward of Tokyo. It was amazingly huge - as in larger than anything I've ever seen - including all the temples and shrines we visited in Kamakura. I also got to enjoy a plate of the best tonkatsu I have EVER had. After touring Senso-ji, they wanted to take me to Akihabara, too, but I declined - simply because I did not want to shop when hauling around two grown Japanese men that I could tell really didn't want to be there in the first place. Finishing my outing with them early opened up a couple of options for the afternoon - unfortunately I didn't take either of them. I made the mistake of lying down and ended up passing out at 4PM, causing a rather rude awakening at 5AM the next day. Nothing a little Japanese Home Shopping Network couldn't fix though... after turning that junk on, I was out like a light again within a half hour

Now, Sunday was planned. I took the time out to check into reservations for Luida's Bar: Dragon Quest - the closest thing Square-Enix has to an amusement park in the entire world (or so I thought). Turns out that on Sundays you don't need reservations, you just show up at a particular time (they told me 11:38) and you get in. Fair enough, right? No. Something didn't smell right. In fact, it downright stunk. Gaijin sense activated.

So, with my gaijin senses tingling, I boarded a train to Roppongi not one, but TWO hours early...even though it was raining quite hard in Tokyo at the time. I don't know exactly what it was, but something was telling me this was a good idea, even if it meant I would have had to camp somewhere until the place opens. About a half hour after disembarking at Roppongi, I find Luida's Bar. Lo and behold, my gaijin sense was SPOT ON. Not only were there people already waiting, but there were A LOT of people waiting. The line stretched past the place, past the place next to it, and down a flight of stairs underneath the building. Fortunately I was one of the last lucky people to get a spot in line outside of the rain. Every single person in this line as far as I could tell had a DSi XL and a copy of Dragon Quest Monsters: Joker 2 (which doesn't mean much to a lot of you - it is a $70 Dragon Quest spinoff DS game that just came out over here, that is all you need to know), and the ones that noticed me appeared a bit confused by my presence. I think one guy even took a picture of me with his phone but I really have no idea why. Maybe it was my imagination, or maybe he was photographing the line.

In any case, at about 11:38, after approximately another hour of waiting in line and mooching on Square Enix wifi, a server comes out of the restaurant and begins a fluent Japanese barrage from the top of the stairs that I could only hear pieces of. This was partially because he was going so fast, and partially because the volume of the echo was louder than the actual speech from where I was standing. What I was able to catch is this. Basically we've been waiting in line for a SPOT to get into the bar at a specific time, not to get into the bar right now. Apparently the sooner you line up, the better slot you get. So I get to the front of the line and get asked what time I want to come back (the bar was already at capacity for the first session). I asked what the soonest available was, and was told 13:00. It was 11:45 now.

I take my ticket and start scouting around Roppongi for something to kill a couple of hours. Lo and behold, there is a McDonalds right down the street. I go inside and order a large fountain pop, which is actually refreshing since I've spent just about all morning waiting in line for a spot at Luida's. They had lots of seating upstairs so I took a seat, sipped my Coke Zero, and ran Kanji cards/played a few games on my iPhone for an hour. Then it's back to the line. I'm first this time, and out of the rain. The server from before returns to the line and hands out the faux velvet-covered menus. I take a look and choose my order.

Hmm... let's see.

Slime-shaped meat bun (check).
Goddess fruit (check).
Medal pizzas (scary, but they look tasty, check).
Fried monster mix (check).

And for drinks:
Something blue and alcoholic that didn't have a dragon quest name, and
A non alcoholic "elf potion" in an actual potion-shaped bottle.

They eventually let us in. Dragon Quest music is blaring. Two waitresses in DQ outfits are getting everything ready and I get two deer-in-headlights OMG-DON'T-MAKE-ME-SPEAK-ENGLISH expressions as I am guided to my table. The bar is standing-room-only quite literally, as there is no room for chairs. It turns out they only let 25 people in at a time and then close the bar, let 25 more in, etc. In this way only 150 or so customers can visit them each day, and they manage to fill every time due to the artificial demand (and the fact that it's Dragon Quest, which over here is like a religion).

I give my order and go to the register to pay, as that's how it's done here - and then return to my table to find one of the waitresses waiting for me. She asks me if I like DQ, to which I reply that most of the current games aren't out yet. My Japanese is still fairly broken at this time - I'm just now getting it back now a few days later - but of course I get comments about how good it is. DQVIII is my favorite game in the series, and only one of three I've actually played. Another waitress gets on a microphone and revs the crowd into a frenzy about Dragon Quest Monsters: Joker 2 and asks them to trade items with each other if they brought their DSes. She also mentioned it was okay to take pictures anywhere in the restaurant, which was really nice as most themed places don't let you do it.

So the food comes. Most of it is fairly decent but not worth the price of admission. I had a couple of good conversations with the waitresses, one of which is trying to get on a study abroad program to the US, but otherwise, it was fairly uneventful. I'm glad I went though, if for no other reason than to be able to say I went. I then had a very nice dinner yesterday with my blue-op team and found out a few interesting things about them too. I won't go into details except to say it makes me feel a little more sane to know that other people think the same way as Lisa and I do.

Interlude 1: Katsuobushi

Ahh, bonito. Or in Japanese, katsuobushi.

These fish flakes are responsible for seasoning 99% of Japanese cuisine. Deliciously subtle when prepared right, disgustingly fishy for Western palates when prepared wrong or in too great of quantities. If you don't like fish and you plan on coming to Japan, unfortunately you will have to live with it. However, if you are unaware of the fact that most dishes are seasoned with fish stock, you will most likely not be able to deduce this fact.

Those familiar with Japanese cuisine may know what I'm talking about, but let me explain for the rest of us. These flakes are either on everything, or in everything, to some degree. Ramen? Yep. Sukiyaki broth? You betcha. Inari? Yep, sorry. Gyuudon (or any donburi for that matter?) There too. Many other dishes are also topped with them - such as yakisoba noodles and okonomiyaki. These flakes were singlehandedly responsible (along with a douche waitress) for making sure Lisa and I would never return to the only (real) sushi restaurant in Rochester. I will spare the details here but needless to say that when these flakes aren't balanced, they can really destroy a decent bowl of noodles.

Needless to say, when Satoshi and Haji took me out for Okonomiyaki on Friday night and I noticed that everything we were being served was piled high with the stuff...oozing and shrinking into the hot food... I was a little doubtful of what I was going to do. I requested the pieces with the least amount of katsuobushi and came to a shocking discovery. That in moderation, and if they're fresh, katsuobushi can be a nice addition to a dish. Sadly, Japanese still love piling the stuff three layers high, which is more than my meat-centric palate can take. I was pleasantly surprised at how non-fishy fresh katsuobushi can actually be.

And I use the term "fresh" with caution here, because the darn things are made by drying fish out for weeks and smoking it...so I really don't know if the term "fresh" can really apply to katsuobushi in the first place.

And my mind is done wandering.

Epic 1: 冒険が始まる

It finally begins.

So I'm going to begin this by saying that until I was finally able to sleep last night, I was up for over 30 hours - due to both the long flight to Japan itself along with the trip to Minneapolis and the layover in Chicago. It was next to impossible to sleep on the shuttle to the Cities or on the plane itself because...of course... the person in front of me reclined into my knees on all 3 legs of the journey - INCLUDING THE SHUTTLE TO MINNEAPOLIS. I'm starting to really wish I was about 5'6" instead of 6'3"

The flight to Japan was nice for a change, because I flew ANA and got to travel in a very, VERY spiffed up Boeing 737. It even had "new plane smell", which up until this point I believed was a myth. Going from the plane that flies the nonstop route to Tokyo from Minneapolis (with broken seats, discolored/cracked projectors with no choice in programming, dirty cabin, etc...) to this brand new plane with individual TV displays (with remote control and on-demand programming), decent food, and comfortable seats* was completely worth the two-hour layover in Chicago. When I booked the flight, the only seat left was in the middle of a row, and I was seriously dreading that flight because as I've learned from experience, tall people and middle seats DO NOT MIX.

*when not being reclined against your legs


It would have been painful, too, if not for the person in the checkin line ahead of me who - for some reason unknown to me - wanted to move her aisle seat to a middle seat closer to the front of the plane. I moved my seat to that aisle seat, so I was able to be at least a little more comfortable. The plane was completely full, so there weren't any opportunities to upgrade to Economy Plus or whatever ANA's equivalent was. Looking at the seats, though, they didn't look much larger than the ones in regular Economy and I'd still have the reclining problem. I'm still a bit sore from the plane 24 hours later, which tells you how cramped it really was. The new planes are slightly more ergonomically designed, but their main purpose is still to cram as many seats as possible into as little space as possible. The only way I could be even REMOTELY comfortable is in first class. Anyone have any frequent flier program suggestions? I'm on Delta's but I'm not taking that Greyhound-in-the-sky for 5 more trips just to earn enough points to attempt - ATTEMPT - acquiring an exit row seat and even then I would only get it if someone else with a higher frequent-flier ranking doesn't come in and pull it out from under me.

On this flight I met a very nice group of Christian missionaries who were flying over to tour Japan and talk to people about their church and programs. When I asked whether they were doing volunteer work, they wanted to say yes but I could tell from their reaction that they weren't going to do much of that and explained they were coming mostly to talk to people and support the efforts of expat missionaries living here in Japan. I explained to them a little bit about the Japanese religious philosophy because they mentioned that the Japanese are one of the most difficult groups to "talk seriously to about God". As an agnostic I am chuckling on the inside - but I would understand exactly why they would feel that way. Japanese people are less religious and more superstitious. Some of their rituals come from Shinto - their creation myths and legends (think Greek/Roman mythology sorts of tales), while other rituals come directly from Buddhism or Zen-Buddhism. Most people have ample exposure to both, but live their own lives without focusing much on a god. When they need guidance in a particular area of their lives, they go pray to the Shinto god/goddess related to their problem at a shrine for luck. They also incorporate some of the Buddhist style teachings into other areas of their lives. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule and there are plenty of Buddhist monks and Shinto shrine maidens (miko) here as well who live very strictly to the tenets of their religion. Their relationship with their religion is very different in general than the average Christian. I explained all of this to the missionaries and they seemed very interested in what I had to say.

One of the people in that missionary group has a daughter on the trip who says she wants to live in Japan (though has never been there) and wants to major in game design. Sounds familiar, ne?

Well, I said that I used to be the exact same way until I came here, and I ended up telling this mother the same thing my parents told me - in that it's OK to want to work on games or in gaming - but when getting a degree you should definitely pursue one of the base programs (such as 3D modeling, computer science, etc.) and work on the game stuff through electives or on your own time - as opposed to getting a dedicated degree in game design. A lot of well-known developers have gone on record to say that they are more likely to hire someone who has a stronger diverse educational background from a known university than a recent graduate of Westwood College. "My mom told me I wouldn't get anywhere with these games!"

In any case, they were a very nice group though there were a couple periods of awkwardness when I asked about what they were doing in Japan. I finished up talking with them by giving a quick "Yen 101" course since I had some Japanese money with me already, and showed them what $1, $5, $10, and $50 equivalents will look like, and how to quickly do the Yen/$ conversion. I also told them that they made the right decision to not exchange their money in the States and to wait until landing at Narita...because most US airports have a really, really nasty markup on foreign currency. I gave the leader of the group my business card and let them know they could contact me if they ran into language or culture issues. They seemed very surprised my work would allow me to do a trip like this. I'm continually reminded how lucky I really am.


A few more interesting notes on flying ANA when compared to Delta/Northwest:

1.) The dinner meal was actually decent and didn't make anyone sick as far as I could tell. They had a choice between katsu curry and steamed salmon, both of which were served with a variety of side dishes. The katsu was actually decent for airline food. They also had a "premium" menu (using the term loosely) where you could pay 700 yen (~$7.80) for what amounts to a bowl of higher-quality instant ramen. The meal they served right before we landed, however, looks like it was taken right from the bowels of American Airlines test kitchens. A burrito. BURRITO - With something resembling cheese, beans, and some sort of mystery meat. It tasted like the instant burritos you can get in most gas stations or at Sam's Club... except with less flavor. I only took a couple bites of that one because I was fairly sure it would make me sick. Fortunately they served this Mexican reject-concoction with a cup of yogurt and a fruit bowl, so I went ahead and ate those. A note to people used to the American melting pot of delicious international cuisine: Japanese-Italian food is scary. Japanese-Mexican food is scarier... ESPECIALLY ON AIRPLANES.

2.) ANA flight experience was wonderful overall. However - it's definitely 1950's over here. They didn't have a single attendant working the flight that looked over 30 years old, all of them were female, and none of them ever stopped smiling. Really different than what we're used to. It was nice being served by people who at least appeared to not hate every second of their job. Whether or not they were actually happy is a whole different issue (tatemae vs. honne which I will not be discussing now). Older and/or male attendants only worked the gate and passport check, and did not serve people on the flight. Interesting.

3.) The flight attendants don't think gaijin can speak Japanese.


I managed to get a little bit of sleep on the plane, but not much...and upon landing I quickly got through customs, exchanged my money, and made it on the just-departing Narita express to be carried into downtown Tokyo which is roughly an hour trip. In my severely jet-lagged brain I had a decision to make. The Narita Express drops off at Shinjuku station, which is quite a walk to my hotel. It's also rush hour. So the question becomes how do I avoid playing Japanese-person bowling with my oversized luggage on the packed trains.

The options were:

A.) Get off at Shinjuku station and walk to the hotel - not happening when carrying that much luggage. It's a good 30-40 minute walk and that would be painful.

B.) Ride the subway - two problems: first I'd have to remember where the entrance is. Second, I'd have to go up/down four flights of stairs with no escalator to enter/exit the subway station.

C.) Ride the train one stop from Shinjuku and walk 10 minutes to the hotel - this is the one I chose and the route we took last time as well. Since I know where I'm going this time, it was a lot less painful. The walk was still tough because I had to bring a lot of stuff, but it was manageable.

On the way to the hotel I spotted no fewer than 10 "vanity" umbrellas carried by women to keep their faces out of the sun (apparently pale skin is "in"). I also spotted a guy walking two dogs, one of which was dressed in a full ballerina costume, tutu and all. Yep, I'm definitely back in Japan...

I was able to rest for a while once reaching the hotel, and then ventured out again to meet two people from the Japanese branch of work - Haji and Satoshi. On the way I tried a little experiment. You see, rumor is that on Japanese trains, you can spread out because of something known on the Internet as the "Gaijin Barrier". It works as follows: on the crowded trains of Japan, people will generally do everything they can to find an empty seat as they usually fill up quickly. But if a foreigner sits in a seat, the seats to the immediate left and right of that foreigner remain empty. People don't want to sit next to us, so the joke/theory is we have a sort of "barrier effect" on keeping the natives at bay. The myth was proven false for the second time today, as upon sitting down on the Chuo-line train bound for Tokyo station, it only took two stops before there was a middle-aged Japanese woman to the immediate left of me, and an elderly Japanese man on the right even though there were other single empty seats in the row. I was rather taken aback by this because the only time I've ever noticed the "Gaijin Barrier" failing before was when I was dressed up in a suit for my presentation at IBM Japan. Apparently if you dress like a tourist people are put off, but not if you're dressed like you belong there. But I was dressed touristy (nice, but touristy) on the Chuo-line and people didn't mind sitting next to me. Weird.

I've gone on for long enough for today. Stay tuned tomorrow for today's events and a side note on one of the biggest love-hate foods of Japan: the katsuobushi, or bonito fish flake.

From Horse Armor To Stimulus And Beyond: Future of DLC

Although this topic isn't exactly a new one, as this (armored) horse has been dead and beaten over and over again since the start of this generation), the launch of Nintendo's new DSi XL has brought some issues to light that a lot of gamers probably haven't spent a lot of time thinking about... namely, what's going to happen to DLC when this generation ends and the next one begins...

First, a few things to ponder:

1.) It is not in the console makers' best interests to make DLC backwards-compatible with previous console iterations. It is in their financial interest, as corporations, to make you buy it again. Proof? Look at how Microsoft half-assed BC in the 360 and how Sony ripped it out of later PS3 models. BC is a financial drain, it doesn't make money and in fact ends up costing them money. "Make your customers buy their games again, boost the bottom line."

2.) Apparently users are scarfing up the DSi XL quite a bit overseas; a lot of these users over in Japan are owners of previous DS systems.

3.) Rock Band and Guitar Hero, cash cows in the world of DLC, have limits on the licenses to their music. If (when) iterations of RB and GH launch on the successors of the 360/PS3 and Wii, will infrastructure be in place to port over existing song catalogs? Again, based on console maker/third party interests, that doesn't make sense. And that doesn't even factor in RIAA/music licensing issues arising from such a function. Almost guaranteed this would be a legal nightmare.

4.) Even assuming you do not purchase a next-gen console, what happens when the XBL/PSN servers are taken offline, particularly if you had a RROD and never transferred licenses?

5.) The casual crowd does not have a concept of "licensing". In their minds, anything they purchase is theirs to keep/own. I guarantee there will be stories on the national news if/when Nintendo announces its next console with a next-gen iteration of Virtual Console with no means of porting over content from existing Wiis. Particularly if that "next console" is a Wii1.5HD, i.e. not a full generation upgrade. Nintendo: your "blue ocean" casual audience - the one you've spent so much time, effort, and marketing dollars catering to - is going to be very ticked off when their VC games don't work on their new Wii. Grandma doesn't know about EULA's.

I'm seeing a fairly disturbing pattern here, and it's one that a lot of gamers probably either fail to notice or don't care about. In the realm of DLC, you don't own your content. You license it.

I will spell this out, to make it even more clear: IN CASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW, YOUR DLC IS NOT YOURS TO OWN.

You are at the mercy of the console manufacturer in regards to most downloadable content, which doesn't bode well for people who spent hundreds of dollars on fleshing out their Rock Band song catalogs. This is something the PC gaming world is already experiencing - with companies like Ubisoft implementing draconian DRM schemes at the expense of users everywhere. Back in the days of "Don't Copy That Floppy", we never had to worry about our old games not being available to play in the future. I still know people who play classic PC games and classic console games on a regular basis. This is going to change.

Ever since the early experiments with content like Horse Armor in Oblivion, all the way through locking out content on the disc, to now where "knowledgable" gamers are fairly aware of what pieces of DLC are actually a decent value - though most have splurged on a few "guilty pleasure" bad deals (my most notable being the SFIV costume pack - which I KNEW was on the disc and yet still bought once the price on it was reduced). The point I'm trying to make is this... I believe gamers are being - or at least SHOULD be - mroe careful as this generation hits its peak and progresses into the background. It is likely the new consoles will be announced next year, despite the fact that to me it appears far too soon (game incubation for current-gen titles is much longer than in the PS2 generation), and when those new systems hit the market they are almost guaranteed to be accompanied by a deluge of downloadable options incompatible with their previous iterations.

At least Microsoft and Sony have _a way_ of making their new systems compatible with old DLC, through progression of PSN and XBL ids to the new systems. Nintendo, on the other hand, has chosen to tie each piece of DS or Wii DLC to the console itself, which creates a whole lot of headaches for the consumer, but a lot of control to Nintendo. For example:

1.) Your console breaks out of warranty, and being the casual consumer you are, you go get a new Wii instead of calling customer service and find that your licenses don't transfer. You complain and then buy your content again. More money for the big N.

2.) You decide to change your business model to a more Apple-oriented approach - rather than releasing new, drastically updated consoles every few years, you release slightly better yearly iterations, bringing in new users and forcing your dedicated fanboys to upgrade. Since DLC is tied to console, the fanboys fork over the money for the few applications they aren't sick of and download them to the new console. Every....time.... More money for the big N.

3.) The new console scenario. Again, pretty much same as above. Fanboys and the casual crowd will both scarf it up and download the applications they found most useful and possibly a few new ones. Fast forward a year and cycle to #(2.)
Endless money-printing machine for the big N.


Be smart. Think before you download.

Typical...

(image from Kotaku.com)

And people wonder why Japanese gamers don't play online.

Translation:
"You stupid JAP cheater. I wonder if you're angry because your dick is small? Do you remember HIROSHIMA and NAGASAKI? We can do that again. Sneaky, stupid dickhead..."

Some analysis:
The Japanese in the note itself looks like the product of an introductory college-level Japanese class combined with "butch speak" picked up from watching too many episodes of Dragon Ball Z, Naruto, and Bleach.

There is some discussion going around about whether or not the messages is faked, but I'm fairly certain it is not, judging from both grammatical (early Japanese courses teach 'node' as 'because' - despite its lack of use in non-formal settings like this; interchanging wa and ha, etc.) and content (overuse of penis terms) point of view - it looks like someone has a bit too much time on his hands and wanted to rage. Said person just happened to be a Bleachtard.

Well, here's a news flash. This whole "play together over the Internet" thing? It wasn't always like that. In a lot of ways, multiplayer this generation has deteriorated. As much as I loathe the Wii's friend codes with a passion, it is nice to not receive hateful messages every time a match or game doesn't go in my opponent's favor. I grew up in the arcade renaissance of Street Fighter II and Mortal Kombat - very competitive games. But I never - EVER - heard people talking trash the way they do now. People would challenge each other to matches, certainly, but that's about it. Even TEAM games have fellow team members yelling into their mics, name-calling, and trash talking their own teammates.

In Japanese arcades, people were too intimidated to play next to the opponent they were challenging in a fighting game. That's why they organize their candy cabs back-to-back, with only one set of controls on each side...this way the winner continues playing and the loser doesn't have to deal with facing the one that beat them.

I suppose the term "GAIJIN SMASH" would apply. Someone from the West thinking he's hot shit by talking down to a Japanese player. I suppose the worst part of the whole thing is the Japanese gamer on the receiving end of this rant probably has no idea how often this type of thing happens when western gamers play online against each other. Honestly, it's rather sickening.

E-CREDDDDDD!!!!

Yoichi Wada has responded to a tweet I made to his account about FF13. ^.^

Apparently my Japanese was semi-readable! YAY!

Abandoning The Hype Train

Final Fantasy XIII released on Tuesday morning at 12:01AM this week. And I was at Gamestop an hour earlier eagerly awaiting the countdown.

After bringing the game home and playing the first few hours - the exact same set of sequences composing the Japanese demo and a lot of the footage used for reviews - I came to a stunning conclusion. For the first time, in years, I'm playing a game where I absolutely, positively, 100% have NO IDEA what's going to happen next. And that, especially for a game as story-based as this one, is a VERY good thing.

I made an effort to avoid internet posts that spoil the game (something I usually don't manage to do with a series that is notorious for long localization periods - I always end up stumbling into SOMETHING). Being careful was absolutely worth the effort.

Stig Asmussen, the God of War III director, made a good point in an interview with Kotaku, in that he said the reason why he doesn't want people feeling like they've played his game before they've actually played his game. And there's some truth to that. In recent years I've gotten so worked up over releases that I'd salivate over any new nugget of information about a game's characters, locales, enemies, and gameplay. In this age - the internet age - it's not difficult to find what you're looking for. Always - without fail - after getting the game home and popping it in, I was fatigued after little more than an hour. I didn't realize at the time that the reason for this fatigue, this desire to NOT play the game I've been looking forward to for so long, was not because I'm simply growing out of games. It was due to overexposure. Hype fatigue. Knowing too much is a BAD thing.

People complain consistently about spoiling things. And I believe there's some truth to it. Major plot points hurt story-based games. Gameplay discussion can hurt action-based games. It's far too easy to get information on the internet, and there's always some dickwad who got it early that would be more than happy to tell you everything in an unassuming forum post (the equivalent to driving by a line outside a bookstore yelling "SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE!!!1!111!"). There is a reason to be careful. And although a victim myself for unrelated reasons, I suppose NeoGAF's itchy trigger finger on the banhammer is itchy for good reason.

Will have a review of the game up soon...

On XBOX Live's "Juvenile" quotient...

Those MAG developers had a good point when they talked about how XBOX Live is generally less mature than PSN, but it all boils down to one thing: voice.

Little Johnny may have gotten his mic with his 360 that his parents bought him as a babysitting device, so he can go on Halo and call people "jew-bags" (and many other insults, both real and made up) and teabag those unfortunate enough to be stuck in a game with him for days on end. But if those same parents bought him a PS3 instead, he can't. At least he can't say much while he's playing - because those parents are far more likely to purchase a Live subscription (why, don't ask me...probably the same reason 12-year-old Johnny is playing M-rated Halo in the first place) than buy a headset.

And that, my friends, is that.

夢と現実 (Dreams and reality)

I guess it still hasn't quite settled in yet.

I'm. Going. To. Japan.

Over the last few days I've been doing a lot of research on the area where I'm actually going to be staying, as well as how far away it is from the areas that I have already been to. It turns out that Okazaki is quite spread out, especially considering how densely packed certain areas of Japan are, and getting around there is going to be interesting to say the least. I could rent a bike, but I'm big by even gaijin standards, so finding one that fits is going to be a hassle. Or I could get rollerblades, but I've never seen them worn there, and most of the sidewalks are most likely designed with earthquake prevention in mind - which means they're BUMPY.

Still trying to figure all that out. I do know that I plan to go to Tokyo for approximately three days before classes begin and will probably stay there overnight on my way out of Japan as well, because a direct flight to Nagoya is actually more expensive than taking the Shinkansen from Tokyo, and I'd like to have some time to myself in the big city to get over my jetlag and prepare for the Big Nihongo Immersion Kamehameha homestay blitz. I can't help but be concerned about that.

I mean, what kind of family would volunteer to take on a 27-year-old gaijin doing a study abroad program at Yamasa? What kinds of people are they? Do they expect me to teach their kids English? Will they even have kids? If they do, will those kids be psycho lolis and rockstar wannabes? Are they going to be an older couple who hate gaijin? Will they think I'm crazy? Will they be afraid of me? Will they like me?

I have no idea about any of this stuff, and I'm constantly playing it back in my mind. I sent the university two pictures to aid in homestay matching: one of myself and the girl, and another of myself with my arcade machines. I wanted to send one of my theatre activities, but since I always play a villain character, all the pictures taken of me make me look "scary". *sigh*. I literally have no idea what to expect, and I'm sitting on pins and needles just waiting to receive a profile from Yamasa explaining exactly who my homestay family is. Under normal study abroad programs, I'd most definitely be considered "creepy old", but under this program I'm a spring chicken. This program is actually built with young professionals in mind, which makes it EXTREMELY different from the others I've researched. Which means the homestay families are expecting this. They get to choose which gaijin they house, so the family choosing me would have seen both my profile and my pictures before making that choice.

I guess it doesn't parse in my head. Japanese are typically very reserved, and keep to themselves - ESPECIALLY as far as associating with outsiders is concerned. So the fact that there are not one, not two, but apparently many families in the area willing to house gaijin working on this program is both bizarre and intriguing to me. Yes, they get a stipend. No, it's probably not worth the trouble of having a big, rampaging gaijin taking up a large portion of their living space and nom nom nom nom nomming their food (which is actually part of the contract - two meals daily).

The fact of the matter is, looking at pictures of Okazaki and hearing stories from people who have already gone over, people are not going to be very nice to me on average. They're going to look at me like I came from another world, and even when I'm speaking perfect Japenese to them will probably be subjected to the Gaijin Blackout and not be able to answer me. I need to harden my resolve in order to not be offended by their actions. I have to remember their history and experience with foreigners are (on average) much less than most societies, although it is getting better, and seeing a living, breathing gaijin in areas farther from big cities is very abnormal for a lot of them. So I have to make sure I can take it in stride, and not feel like there's something wrong with me for existing in their space. I'm sure my Gaijin Barrier isn't THAT strong that it would push someone clear across the street. Still, I'm fairly certain that due to this particular town's location, Gaijin Superpowers will be in FULL effect. Well, except for the Gaijin Power. I don't want that one to activate.

Freebies and Health Care

Waking up this morning and looking at CNN, I found that something very, very interesting happened last night. Scott Brown, a Republican, trounced Martha Coakley (arguably a shoe-in) for the vacant Senate seat formerly occupied by the late Senator Ted Kennedy. As many of you know, this has drastic implications for the direction the country is taking, because Democrats can no longer rely on the filibuster-proof 60 vote majority to steamroll legislation through Congress. This basically all but puts an end to the very progressive- but very broken - health care bill. Which is both fortunate and unfortunate, I think.

At this point I want to take a wait-and-see attitude on Brown. Is he going to be like Lieberman and throw a huge spectacle in order to get the bill changed to something in his favor, or is he going to just kill it outright? Or, perhaps, the focus will shift to another Republican senator who may or may not want the fame associated with sending through a chopped up health care bill for the "sake of the American people"? I think just about anyone in Congress right now could begin stirring the pot and make a "power play" to shape whether this legislation is even passable and what form it will take. The next few weeks are going to be very, very interesting indeed.

To me, as a middle-class fully insured taxpayer, and member of the "young invincibles", here's what I want out of the health care bill:

Modification of contract terms regarding pre-existing conditions (see below )

Caps on what costs insurers can pass on to their customers - an accident or serious illness should not result in a hospital or medical provider to be able to bankrupt someone

Measures in place to cut costs of health care, rather than digging for new funds to pay for it. The reason why medical bankruptcy is such a huge problem is because of our inefficiencies in the health care system, and the ability of providers to charge whatever they like since in most cases, insurance picks up the tab.

Coverage rules in place for only qualified US Citizens.

Methods for increasing competition between insurance companies, and methods to reduce the "conflict of interest" that insurance companies have between their shareholders and policyholders. It is not in their best interest to pay claims - it cuts into their bottom line.

Although young, I had a few incidences where I had to use my insurance and fight tooth-and-nail to get the coverage I paid for. This is unacceptable. I had a $2000 hospital bill for a minor TMJ surgery, which sounds like a lot until you realize that this "simple" procedure (as I was told) cost $12000 total, and insurance picked up the other $10k. It makes me sick to my stomach to think what would have happened if my insurance company said "Ehh. We don't feel like paying for that."

That would have caused serious problems for me. And it happens to people every day. People with heart disease, or cancer. People who get into serious accidents - all things completely out of their control. And yet private insurers deny these types of claims on a daily basis - costing many people their lives.

This gets into a debate on whether health care - and what kind of health care - is a privilege or a right. And I'm not going to go there. What I will say, is that insurance companies should not have a right to accept customers into a policy, collect monthly premiums, and then turn around and cancel their policy when a claim is initiated, citing a "pre-existing condition".

Burden of proof should be on the insurance company at the time the policy is initiated to provide the customer with full disclosure regarding what will or will not be covered by their policy. They should do their "digging" in medical records for these conditions up front, when a person applies for a policy, and their premiums can, and should, affect that "digging" (just like with auto insurance, where lots of accidents equal higher premiums). But they should NOT have the right to sign up a customer, continually collect monthly premiums, and then cancel when it "suits them" - when an expensive claim is filed. In short, they don't look at your history extensively until you get sick, and then they try to find any and all reasons your claim may not be valid. That's not fair.

So this gets back to Brown, and what he may or may not bring to the table. My respect for the current government is pretty much at an all-time low right now. To me, it seems like Republicans represent the corporations and the rich and lobby/pass legislation for them, and the Democrats represent the people that can't support themselves, and pass legislation appropriately. Both parties speak extensively to "support" of the middle class, but it really seems like all hot air from here.

I don't want the government interfering with my daily life. But through unchecked support for the rich and their outsourcing initiatives, the Republicans have affected my job security. And through unchecked support for those too lazy to take care of themselves, or got here illegally, my taxes and health care bills are through the roof. People like me are getting squeezed on both sides.

All of these "Obama money" programs? Stimulus? Back To School Funding?
The only one most middle class citizens qualify for is Cash For Clunkers. And we all saw what happened there. Now when half of these people lose their jobs due to the corporate overlords outsourcing more work to India and China, who's going to pay those car bills? Where are those cars going to end up? Exactly where they started - killing our domestic auto industry. We don't need handouts. We need actual reform. We need a system of checks and balances. Throwing money at these problems won't solve them. Look at the banks, and their multimillion dollar bonuses aimed at retaining "talent". Honestly the only real reform I agree with in that damn stimulus was increasing unemployment benefits and reducing COBRA costs. That WAS an initiative aimed at the middle class, enabling them to support themselves while picking themselves up and trying to reenter the workforce.

Politics is a touchy subject for me, because EVERYONE IS WRONG. There is no one supporting us. They need our moneys to fund initiatives to the two groups of people who actually benefit from government. Those that have the sway to stay on top, and those at the bottom continue to sit on their butts and collect at our expense.

Washington is out for no one but themselves. And we're the ones paying.

Miscellaneous ramblings...

I have quite a bit to talk about today, as I just received word that in a few months I will be studying intensive Japanese conversation at a university in Okazaki, Japan. It will be my chance to live in a Japanese home for four weeks - total immersion - and explore the Kansai region of Japan. This is something I've always wanted to do, and I'm very grateful that my boss, his boss, and the Big Boss all granted their approval to let me go on leave. This is going to be the longest few months of my life.

Stay tuned to this blog, as I will be posting A LOT of content here during the trip, which gets underway towards the end of May...

Now, on to the main portion of this entry, and the part which is most likely going to get me in trouble...

First of all, I've been trying really, really hard to keep my mouth shut on this. I've had time to stew on this over the last few days, and I honestly just can't take it anymore. It's been bothering me so much that even though I'm guessing that it's going to impact a couple of the few friendships I currently have right now, I have to say it.

And, like most drama in today's world, it all began with a facebook comment.

My girlfriend drew my attention to something on the news. Apparently, a televangelist named Pat Robertson had the NERVE to blame Haiti's earthquake on a "deal with the devil" (upon further research, the practice of voodoo) which apparently had some sort of effect in kicking out the French and turning the "prosperous" former colony into one of the poorest nations on Earth.

I bristled at this, and left a comment stating my distaste at the far right side of the political spectrum. But, then again, televangelists say a lot of things to keep their followers in check, and even crazier things to get interviews with the media. There are even bigger wacko preachers (like Fred Phelps) out there who say and do things that are a whole lot worse, but the media tends to avoid those guys a bit more than moderate crazies like Robertson.

So there were some comments going back and forth on the story, and we were all getting a pretty good laugh out of the whole thing until ... someone defended the story.

Before I go any further on this, I have to say one thing. The people that defended the validity of Haiti's earthquake possibly being caused by that "voodoo" magic on facebook, at least as far as my friends are concerned, are some of the kindest, most down-to-earth folks I have ever met in my life. Period. They are very religious, but they truly practice what they preach in all walks of life. It is a pleasure to know them, and to be friends with them. If they needed anything, I would most certainly do whatever I could to help them out. And despite our differences in beliefs, they are completely accepting of me. I have a tremendous amount of respect for them.

I guess that's why I'm so disappointed, and maybe even a little disgusted. Not with the people, but with the lack of logic used for deciding one's beliefs on this particular issue.

One of the truly great things about living in this country is to be able to believe in anything you wish, or to not believe at all. I am not disappointed that they choose to believe. I am disappointed that they choose to listen to these kinds of statements, turn blinders on, and not pass them through logic filters which I know to be present in their minds - because they are so logical, and intelligent - brilliant even - on other matters...but when it comes to this kind stuff, anything's fair game.

God's punishing Haiti. He punished New Orleans for Mardi Gras, too... too much debauchery...

So, following that train of logic... where, may I ask, was God during World War II? Was he siding with the Germans? Obviously not, since they lost - badly - but those Jews being oppressed sure could have used a natural disaster or two to break down Nazi order and close those concentration camps. And he definitely wasn't siding with the Japanese - they are by nature polytheistic and do not have Puritan sets of morals (although he did let them bomb Pearl Harbor and kill a few thousand Americans, and many thousands more at the Battle of Okinawa later on - perhaps they were all nonreligious?). Maybe that's why he gave us the A-bomb. God really must have had a beef with Japan.

I could go on, but my point is... God punishing Haiti makes just about as much sense as the situations I listed above. I'm not trying to be spiteful or insulting here, although I may come across as a bit sarcastic... I know that an answer to this (and admittedly one that I can't really debate) is: "God works in mysterious ways, and that he has a reason for doing what he does". That may be so, but what goes on in today's world completely contradicts anything the Bible talked about - in terms of God's involvement in events around the world, I mean. People look for that meaning now...try to find it, search for it. There's no voice from the sky.

I still like the people I'm discussing here. I still respect them. I hope I can still be friends with them. I'm just disappointed.

I was religious at one point - Roman Catholic, to be exact. I went to Sunday school every week, church every Sunday, and my first "solo" act on stage was actually reading a portion of the Nativity story to a Christmas Eve mass in Huntsville, Alabama in 1992. I lost my faith when I began being bullied mercilessly in school after moving to Naperville, and began focusing more on science, which suddenly made the world around me (which admittedly wasn't THAT bad - especially when compared to something like what happened in Haiti, but it was torturous for me) make much more sense. There was nobody "looking out for me". It was me, just me. That's it. I had to take care of myself. And I've lived that way since then.

I get scared sometimes living in red country. People, for the most part, are very nice. Almost too nice, particularly the religious folks. I always wonder how much their attitudes overall would change once you are "exposed" as not "one of them" (i.e. athiest, agnostic, gay, Muslim, etc...). But these folks were, and are, different. I actually went to church a few times here in Minnesota, but was immediately disgusted when the pastor went on a 5 minute rant about how homosexuals are evil and will go to hell. The fact everyone was so kind to me before and after the service made me want to puke. I mean, I can only imagine how I would have felt if I was a homosexual.

I guess I'm just disappointed. And this note may cause issues with friendships, but I really don't care anymore at this point. It's just too much.

Please, please do not say that the people of Haiti deserved what happened to them. I don't care who the fuck you are, or how many followers you have. You have absolutely no right.