Ghost Squad

Review 4: Ghost Squad - Your mission, SEGA, was to create a lousy Wii cash in using absolutely none of the horsepower or ingenuity of the console. At this mission, you have succeeded brillantly...

Oh man. There are so many of these games for the Wii that I'm getting sick of reading about them and even sicker of playing them. Publishers have discovered a formula which they seem to be using more and more often to squeeze $$ out of the Wii's expanding userbase:

1. Dig into your company code archives.
2. Find something that can be ported quickly and dirtily.
3. Tack on some waggle.
4. Profit!

I knew the time would come sooner or later when I'd take one of these "quickies" to task and actually post a (scathing) review. That time, unfortunately for publisher Sega, is now. And I'm sorry for picking on Sega, but as a publisher known for putting out some gems lately, you have to be held accountable when you churn out the turds. First you rush a HORRIBLY buggy Sonic The Hedgehog next-gen title out for 360 and PS3, and then you drop this turd-of-a-game on the completely undeserving userbase of the Wii. For shame, Sega. For shame... I expect this from Ubisoft, Activision, and THQ, but not from you...

At its heart, the concept of Ghost Squad is simple. It takes an arcade light-gun shooter, adds a few extras and party games, and brings the package home at a bargain price. However, there is very little content for the money here, and what is provided is so ridiculously sub-par that I could barely tolerate the game for longer than the hour it took to blaze through the provided 3 missions. After playing the (much better) Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles, this game seems unfinished in comparison, even taking into consideration its status as an arcade port.

I guess first I'll start with the positives. First, for a light-gun shooter, the control with the Wii-mote fits perfectly. You point, you shoot, terrorists die. It's not hard, and fairly well-implemented. The cursor sensitivity settings are decent, and it's easy to hit your marks. There are a lot of unlockable costumes and other goodies, but the main game is so disgustingly sub-par that it would take someone with a lot of patience to push through and unlock them all. Same is true for the branching paths in the levels. Depending on your choices as well as how well you perform in timed "action events" (little minigames ranging from eliminating a certain number of enemies with a sniper rifle to diffusing bombs) the path through each stage will differ. Again, if you are a completionist and MUST see every part of the three graphical nightmares the game calls "stages", you'll be playing for quite a while.

Where this game falls apart is in production values and extras. Given that the game was developed by Virtua Fighter gurus AM2, I expected it would at least showcase more of what the Wii can do. At the very least, a slight update of the original arcade game's graphics - like Namco did with Time Crisis II for PS2 - would have sufficed. Unfortunately, Sega would have none of that here. What they gave us is a bare-bones arcade port, with graphics that look like an early PS2 game. Jaggies and muddy textures galore, and even SLOWDOWN when more than 3 characters are on the screen at once. This is COMPLETELY unforgivable when dealing with a game of this type (light-gun games generally relied on their graphics to draw players in), and makes the entire product look disgustingly rushed. The game offers unlimited continues, so it's pretty easy to beat all 3 missions in one setting (though you can actually FAIL the last mission and end your game prematurely by messing up an action event). The voice acting is typical light gun game fare (in that it's horrible to the point of being funny), but neither helps nor hinders the game itself. Music is fairly forgettable.

As I mentioned before, there are quite a few extras thrown in, such as unlockable costumes and party games. But honestly, good thing this is a budget game, because it's going to be extremely difficult for any hardcore gamer to see past this game's shortcomings in both length and graphics. I'm hoping this team is NOT in charge of the upcoming House of the Dead 2 and 3 Return ports for Wii. As they are both better games at their core than Ghost Squad, I still have faith in you, Sega... Don't let me down again.


Rating System: Who needs stars and numbers? I'm all about the otaku emoticons!

*-* = Amazing
^-^ = Good
-_- = Fair
T_T = Poor


Graphics: T_T
Disgustingly hideous, some of the worst I've seen on Wii. From the muddy textures and jaggies to the slowdown present in many cutscenes, this was a blatant rush-job. The code ported from the arcade version seemed to be "dumbed down" for a console that is blatantly more powerful than the arcade hardware originally running the game. This is unforgivable, and sadly, only one of many games that is taking the "we don't have to do graphics because it's the Wii" route. One positive: I noticed a lot of objects in the environments were destructible, which was a nice touch.

Sound: -_-
Hilariously bad voice acting complements forgettable arcade music. Really nothing else to say here...it gets the job done, for an arcade game. Nothing really stands out as either good or bad. The dialogue can be unintentionally funny at times.

Replayability: -_-

It's an arcade port. There's extra missions and things to unlock, along with party games, but after playing the arcade mode, you most likely won't want to see any more. Kudos to the developers for adding extra content, though I wonder how many players will be able to stand looking for it after completing arcade mode. There are multiple paths through each mission as well...so if you did want to see everything, it would take you a while to do it.

Downloadable Content: N/A

Wii game. No DLC.

Fun Factor: T_T

Simply not much fun to play. Though it can help hone your skills for better light-gun shooters. If you're in the mood for a light gun shooter on Wii, do yourself a favor and pick up the much-more-complete Resident Evil:The Umbrella Chronicles.

Overall: T_T

Sorry, Sega... Mission: Failed.

10 things that I learned from getting my arse kicked in a Guilty Gear tourney this weekend...

1.) Millia rushdowns don't work against anyone except No Pants Kid, who has absolutely no idea what an instant recovery is nor how to use one effectively. If you rush down a tournament player, expect to be thrown and then comboed into oblivion.

2.) One dust opening will cost you 80% of your life bar when playing against Robo Ky. And no, it's not pretty to see 80% of your lifebar magically disappear in the span of a 6-second unescapable air combo... especially when it's done to you MORE THAN ONCE.

3.) Tournaments are BYOC (bring your own controller), and nobody uses PS2 controllers. Custom arcade sticks are the norm here, folks. I still don't understand this. I like the way an arcade stick feels but for some reason I'm more accurate with my special moves on a PS2 controller. I guess I'm still a n00b.

4.) Whiffing an overdrive is a no-no, you'll be eating an extra helping of combo sandwich before you even realized what you did...

5.) Dust button is your friend. Really. Air combos FTW. As long as you're not on the receiving end, that is...

6.) Nobody plays as Jam. R1 is no longer the red-haired costume, in Accent Core either -- you hear that, No Pants Kid?

7.) Sol, Ky, Robo Ky, Slayer, Potemkin, Axl. You'll be playing against (and most likely get pwnd by) one or more of these. Guaranteed.

8.) Roman Cancels. That is all.

9.) A life bar can be depleted in less than five seconds.

10.) I've never felt more insignificant in my entire life.


The last one's a joke, of course.

I've now been reformed into tournament-style play. Today marks the beginning of my first step in "real" Guilty Gear play. HEAVEN OR HELL... LET'S ROCK!

Grudge Match! Naruto CoNR vs Naruto GNT4

COMING SOON...

Naruto: Rise of a Ninja

Review 3: Naruto: Rise of a Ninja - can developer Ubisoft Montreal deliver on a well-known anime/manga franchise? Believe it-tebayo!

As long as there has been anime and video games, the two have been unmistakably intertwined with each other. Just about every famous anime has had at least one game adaptation, and some long-running series (*cough* Gundam *cough*) have had practically hundreds. Like many licenses, the results among these kinds of games are decidedly mixed, though it is generally argued that their quality has increased substantially in the PS2 generation forward. From Dragon Ball Z Budokai 1 - 3 to Bleach DS, anime games are rising both in popularity and quality. The current 'darling' of this upward trend in anime licensed gaming happens to be Naruto. In the last generation, there were two stand-alone PS2 fighters in the Ultimate Ninja (Narutimate Hero in Japan) series, and two Gamecube fighters in the Clash of Ninja (Gekitou Ninja Taisen!!) series. Both sets of games managed reasonably high scores, and the latter is often played in tournament settings around the country.

Due to this surge in popularity and brisk sales of both titles, it's not surprising that a large international publisher smelled a ride on the money train and began developing an exclusive game for the Xbox 360 in the Naruto franchise. What was unusual about this game was its developer: Assassin's Creed studio Ubisoft Montreal. Upon hearing this, the fans were livid. How could a non-Japanese studio possibly due the game justice?! This was a legitimate concern, as Ubisoft is well known (along with EA and others) for doing quick license cash-ins. However, I'm happy to report that the game turned out much better than I (or a lot of other people) expected it to.

For those unfamiliar with the Naruto storyline or characters, it revolves around the coming-of-age of a young ninja who bears the burden of having a powerful demon creature (a Kyuubi - ninetailed demon fox) sealed inside of him...and that's pretty much all I need to say here, since the storyline depicted in the game will take you through the first 60 episodes of the anime. I will say that the storyline is generally more interesting than other shonen series such as Dragon Ball, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Bleach, and I think if you have a tolerance for this kind of thing you'll find something to like here - but chances are you're already familiar enough with the storyline to be excited about this game... or, that you don't give a flying rat's arse about the franchise.

For the latter group, there is a fairly substantial fighting engine included in the game, along with several versus and online battle modes. The single player mode attempts to diversify and space out the combat by giving you an entire city to explore in-between missions. Within the city, you can earn money and level up your character by completing various quests for the villagers. The quests increase in difficulty as the game progresses, and completing them al Unfortunately, these quests tend to fall into 3 very repetitive patterns: (1.) the timed race, where you have to run through a set of gates before the time limit expires *these are a pain towards the end of the game* (2.) the fetch quest *a villager has left something valuable outside the village, go beat up some bandits and get it back*, or (3.) collectathon *grab enough coins/herbs/scrolls to satisfy the villager requesting them*. The game is kind enough to include a warping system to get you back to Konoha...err, 'the Village Hidden in the Leaves' (SCREW YOU, DUBBERS *ahem* -_-) after completing a quest, which is convenient and makes completing the quests more bearable. The quests reward you with a higher health or chakra limit, as well as money that you can use to purchase stat-boosting upgrades for your character or learn new moves. The more quests you complete, the more villagers will be happy with you. The happy the villagers are, the more achievements you unlock.

Actual missions that progress the storyline are generally made up of a sequence of battles that you have to complete without dying. If you do die, the game includes a 'memoclip' system that allows you to regain portions of your life back by recalling memories that occurred earlier in the game. If you run out of memoclips and die, it's game over. Die enough times, though, and the game will give you the option to refresh your memoclips, so you really can't get stuck. This was a good design decision, since the linear story missions don't always allow you the luxury of going back to town to re-stock supplies the way optional quests do. That's pretty much the single player mode in a nutshell.

As for the fighting portion of the game, it's a mixed bag, but is generally solid overall. The usual punch and kick buttons can be pressed in sequences to form combos, and you can teleport behind your opponent using the Block button if you have enough chakra remaining in your meter. This counter move becomes vital to escaping combos when fighting skilled opponents. The special moves (in this case, jutsus) require you to hold down a button and do hand-signs by pressing both analog sticks in specific directions. Once the jutsu is activated, a charge time is required as well (the more powerful the jutsu, the more charge time is required). In general, it will take at least 3-4 seconds to activate a jutsu. Those of you familiar with fighting games know that this is a LONG time to be unable to move or attack. Because of this, the engine allows for very few instances where a jutsu can be used effectively without being cancelled out. One more thing about the jutsus - assuming you actually get one to go off, you are then treated to a minigame. Timed button presses, tracking, memorization are all the norm here. Some people will like this, since it gives the player defending against the jutsu a chance to negate some (or all!) of the damage, but personally I like to be able to relish in the moment when I do a special move, not worry about a bunch of timed button presses just to make sure it hits. In general, the countering system rewards timing rather than mashing, so the game tends to play like a cross between Gekitou Ninja Taisen and Dead or Alive. It's fun, for what it is. The initial character roster is SORELY lacking, but the developer makes up for it with .... $6 DOWNLOADABLE CHARACTERS! YAY! -_-

The graphics in both modes are amazing, and the Naruto world is represented very well. The in-game character models, though rendered very well, lack expression. The mouths don't even move when the characters talk. This makes the whole package seem a bit rushed at times, since most of the cutscenes are ripped directly from the anime the developer probably decided that they didn't need to implement a lot of emotion for the polygonal models. In exploration mode, you can't really tell the difference, but in fight mode, it's a glaring flaw.

I for one, absolutely loathe a lot of the dubbing for Naruto. Some is tolerable, but in general I have a problem playing a game where "believe it!" is shouted every two seconds. Therefore, I give major props to Ubisoft for including the option to download the Japanese voices. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU. You made the game a lot more tolerable for me.

Sadly, the single player story mode doesn't finish the story arc that it ends in, so yet again we're left feeling that the package had been rushed out. Whether Ubi has implemented the ability for additional story missions (Itachi, Kisame, Sannin saga, Naruto vs Sasuke saga *I can dream*) is unknown at this time, but judging how they showed the credits (no spoilers here), I'm going to go out on a limb and say that they do have that functionality built in. It's only a matter of time before we see it.

Overall, it's a great game. There's a lot to see and do, and fans of franchise will most likely not be disappointed.

Rating System: Who needs stars and numbers? I'm all about the otaku emoticons!

*-* = Amazing
^-^ = Good
-_- = Fair
T_T = Poor


Graphics: -_-
The character models themselves are detailed, environments are lush, city is well populated. Unfortunately, the actual number of models is small (about 10 different villagers), and main characters do not move their eyes or mouth when speaking in fight mode. This is a disgusting oversight, since the last-gen Naruto fighters don't have this problem.


Sound: *-*
Japanese voices. Japanese voices. JAPANESE VOICES!!! I can play a US-centric Naruto game without hearing "Believe it!" every 20 seconds. THANK YOU, Ubisoft. Other than that, the music is ripped right from the show, so you won't find many surprises, but those of you familiar with the show will find a lot to like.

Replayability: ^-^

Lots of stuff to do here. Tons of optional quests, lots of power-ups to collect. The online mode has you entering the "Forest of Death" exam, forcing you to win a specific number of times in a row before advancing to the next tier. This creates a lot of competition for those harder-to-get achievements. You can't choose your opponent here, either, so good luck pairing up with your buddy to whore out those Gamerpoints.

Downloadable Content: -_-

I like what's been coming out. So far, 5 new characters (one of which was free for registering the game), and four new arenas, with most likely more to come. What I don't like is paying $5 for characters every month that should have been included in the original release of the game. If they wanted to compete with the Gekitou Ninja Taisen!! (Clash of Ninja) or Narutimate Hero series fighting games, they needed more characters FROM THE BEGINNING, NOT AS DLC. In the defense of the publisher, the content was indeed added after the release (this can be deduced from the large size of the downloads), and not already on the disc. If the characters were cheaper, I'd give a higher rating. As it stands, if you don't download extra fighters, the roster is sparse. I blame Canada.

Fun Factor: ^-^

A good game and a step in the right direction for anime licensed games. While not as strong as an individual exploration game or combat game, the combination of things to do here is all done reasonably well, and will keep you busy for a while.Now bring on the Cyber-Connect 2 developed Naruto PS3 project. Oh, and a Clash of Revolution sequel for Wii...or an import player for Wii...or something.

Overall: ^-^

Journalistic Integrity in Gaming

Lately there has been a lot of controversy in the gaming media about publisher influence on gaming review scores.

While it's pretty much common knowledge that publisher advertising generates a large part of what keeps gaming magazines and websites in business, the treatment of the journalists by publishers is something that really isn't talked about much. There was recently a very interesting article on 1up about the bribes and threats experienced by the EGM team (although I can't seem to find the article now, it must have been taken down).

In Japan, it goes even further than bribes and threats. Over there, publisher-journalist review negotiation is a common practice. A publisher's influence is so great, in fact, that they get to comment on a review score prior to publication, and negotiate changes in the scores. Famitsu knows its fanbase, and caters to it. It doesn't bother giving most high-budget Square Enix games (like Final Fantasy/Kingdom Hearts/etc.) less than 9's, because they realize their fanbase is going to buy the game regardless of the reviews (even if the individual reviewers aren't fans of the franchises, for example). That being said, Famitsu doesn't deliberately score games lower than what the reviewers actually believe they should be scored, but high-budget advertising in the magazine tends to significantly inflate review scores. As I said, this is common practice in Japan and isn't considered immoral or corrupt. Japan lacks any kind of rental infrastructure due to laws inacted by none other than Nintendo during the NES era, and therefore gaming magazines like Famitsu carry a lot of weight as far as letting gamers know what to buy, even to this day.

Here in the US, I believe as the price of games and consoles continue to rise, the media's influence increases. Gamers are relying on reviews more than ever because of these price increases. No one wants to buy a $60 Turd (or in most cases, a $79.99 copy of Turd: The Collector's Edition - including artbook and sountrack), it makes them feel ripped off. Back in the days of the PS1 where games clocked in at $39.99, it was a little different - you could afford to gamble. You could buy TWO games for the price of Turd: The Collector's Edition.

That's why, nowadays, it's becoming even more important to publishers to create games worthy of good review scores...but more importantly, it's important for the media to maintain some form of honesty. I respect Dan "Shoe" Hsu of EGM, who not only stands firm with the review scores that the magazine gives, but called out (by name) the publishers who decided to cut off the flow of coverage to EGM due to disappointment in the review scores. For reference, those publishers are Ubisoft, Midway, and Sony Sports. Publishers, wake up. Start releasing better games and stop trying to get journalists fired for honesty. Gamers see through your crap.

Then again, publishers are as likely to stop bribing and threatening journalists as they are to stop releasing hundreds of horrible games based on movies every year... My advice to all of you: STOP BUYING THOSE, FOR THE GOOD OF ALL OF US!

K. Thx. Bai.

Decisions...

Hmm.

Folklore wasn't even worth a review, so my next two choices are Soul Nomad and the World Eaters, or a classic review of Grandia II for the Dreamcast. Thoughts? Preferences?

In response to comments...

俺はスペインゴが分からないけど、そのコッメントの意味がすこし分かった。

I noticed that a commenter asked whether or not I own Guitar Hero, so I'll go ahead and post something...this is a picture of one of the walls of my "Retro Room" which houses many a console and game. We found something interesting to do with our guitar controllers, since they do tend to take up a lot of space...

And to No Pants Kid, who compared Sonic Wii to Bubsy, I just tried to enlighten my girlfriend to the wonder that is Bubsy: Claws Encounters of the Furred Kind for SNES (after she inquired about the game after reading your comment). After putting it in the console and switching it on, I was dismayed at the black screen staring back at me... the game is now broken, after many, many years of being in solitary confinement in a box in a large Naperville basement. My grandparents paid $70 for that game back in the day... Sonic holds the advantage over Bubsy in that it actually works. :-)

Angsty Gaijin's Import Report 2: Crisis Core Final Fantasy VII

The year: 1997.

In a move that will probably forever be known as "the coup which singlehandedly assured the success of Sony in video gaming", Japanese RPG developer Square cut all ties to Nintendo and released the latest title in the long running Final Fantasy exclusive to Sony's PlayStation, citing the space limitations of the cartridge format used by the Nintendo 64.

That game was Final Fantasy VII, and was many a mainstream gamer's first taste of the JRPG genre. The emotional-yet-complex story, the cinematic presentation, the familiar-but-evolved gameplay. Everything was epic, brand new in every way, and yet unusually familiar. Billed too complex for some, too confusing for others, this was definitely a game unlike anything that came before it. One thing almost everyone familiar with Square can agree on, however, is that Final Fantasy VII is a game that changed the face of the JRPG genre forever...taking it into a brand new - and decidedly more cinematic - direction. The game left a significant impact on a generation of gamers, and its storyline and characters continue to be celebrated and remembered 11 years later.

It came as no surprise, then, that throughout the lifecycle of the PlayStation, and most of the PlayStation2, fans have clamored for more FFVII. Hearing the money train rolling into the station, Square (now Square Enix) obliged with not one, but THREE games and a movie set in Gaia, the world of Final Fantasy VII.

Advent Children was developed as the movie sequel to VII, and while far superior to its distant cousin (Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within), it was still exceptionally lacking in many areas. The movie forced all the characters to shed any form of character development, instead relying on constant fight scenes and a deus-ex-machina plotline that ends up being little more than fan service. For what it was (a 90-minute cutscene in the Final Fantasy VII world), it was moderately enjoyable, but as a stand-alone movie or successful attempt at pulling us back into the FFVII world, it failed miserably.

Most of the games didn't fare much better. Before Crisis was a cellphone game starring the Turks, set before the events of Final Fantasy VII. The game scored lousy reviews in Japan, and hasn't even made its way over to the US yet (mostly due to our technologically-inferior cellphones) [Ed. NO, THE iPHONE CANNOT RUN IT. SRY. KTHXBYE]. The PS2 project, Dirge of Cerberus, is an action game starring Vincent Valentine (another character from VII) that takes place after Advent Children ends. Unfortunately...Square Enix's specialty isn't action games, and it shows. The engine was sloppily put together and the game was decidedly tedious to play, but the graphics were good. Unfortunately, the game tanked both in sales and in reviews, and for the most part deserved to tank. It was a game completely unworthy of the Final Fantasy VII name, and like Before Crisis, faded into obscurity very quickly...

That leaves the last game. Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII. Does it suck as much as the other Compilation projects? Is there any particular reason why Square Enix took two extra years to develop this game? Should I even care anymore?

The answers to those questions are NO, YES, and YES. Crisis Core is far from a failure and leaps and bounds much more complete and polished than any other project in the Compilation. That doesn't mean that it's flawless, but it's a step in the right direction and an exciting addition to the FFVII universe. In fact, this is probably the only product the compilation has produced even remotely worthy of the FFVII name.

Before you get TOO excited, however, there are a few things that have to be made abundantly clear. First of all, this is not a traditional RPG. It is a single player action game much more in the vein of Kingdom Hearts. As such, its battle system is completely real-time, though most enemies do not appear on the field until initiating a 'random battle'. It's fairly similar to the way KH and KHII handle enemy encounters, and therefore most Squeenix nerds will feel right at home. Materia stones return in force, with several types available ranging from stat boosts to spells and special attacks, and these can be mixed and matched for optimal results just like in FFVII. The biggest problem with the battle system is the D.M.W. (Digital Mind Wave). This system continually matches symbols automatically in the upper left hand corner of the screen in the style of a slot machine, and matching specific patterns will trigger everything from summons to limit breaks to LEVEL UPs. Yes, that's right. Level ups on your character and your materia, as well as the triggering of summons and limit breaks are all completely RANDOM, decided by the slots. Though triggering attacks and level-ups tends to occur more often when you're taking massive damage, this is inexcusable. There was no reason for Square to randomize what used to be in the player's control. The graphics and sound, like with most Square games, are top-notch and the visuals it manages to crank out of the PSP can compete favorably with just about anything on the PS2, with the possible exception of FFXII.

Aside from following the storyline, there are additional bite-sized 'missions' that can be accessed from any save point. Completing these tasks will award you with additional items and battle experience. The mission structure works well for a portable game, since often there can be times when a player may want to make progress in the game for a little while without advancing the story.

I'm not going to get into any storyline details here for fear of OMGSPOILARZ except to say that it takes place immediately before Final Fantasy VII, and the main character is SOLDIER 2nd Class Zack Fair. The story appears to be a little unusual at first, as does Zack's over-the-top personality as compared to the angsty, brooding, apathetic Cloud. So much so that I sometimes wonder what Square Enix is going to do with certain scenes that really wouldn't mesh well with the American audience and how they would most likely be viewing Zack as a character.

Importability? Well, that depends. The game is very playable, and there are several walkthroughs online to tell you what to do and where to go. You will, however, be missing out on the complicated story and be scratching your head more than a few times at characters' behaviors. Even those with a little Japanese experience may want to consult a story guide as they're going through, to make sure they don't miss anything. The ability to read katakana goes a long way in navigating the menus and equipping materia. Without the ability to understand what you're equipping, customizing your character can quickly become a chore. I would have become frustrated very quickly if I didn't have knowledge of Japanese.

Those who can wait only have a couple more months. The fully localized US version touches down on 3/28. Thank you Square Enix for finally releasing a game that lives up to the FFVII history.

Sonic and the Secret Rings (It Came From...The Bargain Bin) mini-review

It Came From... The Bargain Bin

Sonic and the Secret Rings (a.k.a. Sonic Wildfire) for Wii

This is a difficult game to review, mainly because I've struggled with trying to get even the smallest sense of enjoyment out of Sonic the Hedgehog for the Xbox 360.

In fact, in order to give a better idea as to what S&SR does right, I'll have to spend a bit of time ranting about what Sonic 360/PS3 did wrong. I wanted to like that game, I REALLY did, because it's one of the few Japanese games on the system with a recognized brand. However, abysmal collision detection and boundary issues caused me plummeting to my death from what appeared to be solid ground...not to mention the glitchy camera, incessant load times, and poor level design issues (pressing a button to run over poorly placed pits of sand without sinking, mere milliseconds after hitting a speed booster? No thanks.) that caused me to utter many an expletive in distaste at Sonic Team's disgustingly bad QA in an attempt to release the game for the holiday season last year. The worst offender of the collision detection and bad level designs are the "mach speed" sections of the game, which play like poorly laid out racing levels. Sonic races along (all too fast) and if you hit an obstacle or enemy, you die. Simple as that. The problem is, Sonic moves too quickly, and the "wide, expansive" environments make it somewhat difficult to figure out where you're supposed to go next. Furthermore, the design of these sections feels almost random. I found myself continuously fighting the game trying to figure out what the developers WOULDN'T PLAN on a player doing, so I wouldn't fall victim to unnecessary death-by-bug. Sadly, I still ran into bugs over and over again while keeping this in mind, and never wanted to press through to obtain even one single achievement award.

All that being said, Sonic and the Secret Rings for the Wii does just about everything right that Sonic 360/PS3 does wrong. It plays like the 360's mach-speed sections with better designed environments, less bugs/camera problems, and controls that don't suck. The graphics in the environments are clearly some of the best on Wii (pre Mario Galaxy, of course), with lighting and particle effects clearly beyond what the Gamecube was capable of. Using the Wiimote to control the game feels awkward at first, and admittedly it takes a while to adjust to the new control scheme before the game takes off and begins to feel "Sonic-esque." One problem I ran into (with both this game and in the mach-speed sections of the highly inferior next-gen Sonic) is that if you lose momentum and have to dodge an obstacle or enemy right in front of you, you may end up hitting it multiple times, usually killing you. Losing momentum can be lethal. This problem is avoided by learning the courses, but admittedly, the controls will cause a few cheap deaths - ESPECIALLY at first when learning the courses. There are seven courses in all (plus a tutorial level). Each course contains many sub-missions, a lot of which are required to unlock more courses and advance through the game. Sadly, some of these missions end up being exercises in frustration, taking objectives such as "Don't get hit", "Collect 99 rings", etc., and turning you loose in modified versions of the main courses to try your luck at achieving those objectives. Naturally, these "modified mini-courses" for each mission have been custom-tailored to make it more difficult to achieve your goal. For example, a mission set in the desert course with the objective "survive until the end" will have less rings available, and stick extra cacti right in your running path to throw you off/kill you. There are a lot of variations to the maps, and all of them appear as though they're meant to screw you over. It's more of an annoyance than a flaw, though, because there is definitely a sense of reward that goes along with beating the harder missions. As you complete these missions, you gain experience (!!! yes, experience), and new abilities. The abilities you learn make the more difficult missions easier to clear. Some examples of these abilities include running faster, adding elements to your attacks, extra rings, speeding up or slowing down time, etc...

A lot of reviewers complain about the cheesy music and voices, but they don't really bother me. I play the game in Japanese, so I don't even hear the campy English voice acting, and the music actually fits the game well. The multiplayer mode is tacked on and is definitely not worth much mentioning.So far I've only unlocked 3 of the 8 courses (tutorial, Sand Oasis, and Dinosaur Jungle), but I'm extremely surprised at how well this game turned out for Sonic Team. And at the price it's available at right now, it's difficult to justify not picking it up.

NiGHTS - Journey of Dreams

Review 2: NiGHTS: Journey of Dreams - Dream come true for those wishing for a REAL (i.e. not minigame collection) third party game on the Wii

A long, long time ago, back when this Gaijin was just a little otokonoko , there was a console from Sega called the Saturn. Although this console was prematurely snuffed out by the PS1's gargantuan third-party support and the N64's pre-release hype train, it managed to crank out a few memorable games before its untimely death. The most memorable among them is a difficult-to-describe on-rails-'platformer' by Sonic Team called NiGHTS: Into Dreams.
Unlike anything that came before or after it, this game combined the elements of platforming with on-rails flight. The only thing that could 'kill' you is running out of time (being hit by an enemy would subtract seconds from your clock). I'll admit I didn't spend a lot of time playing the original NiGHTS, but the game is fondly remembered by gaming enthusiasts as being astonishingly unique and fun for the time, and one of the only games really worth playing on the Saturn. Fans of the original have begged and pleaded with Sega for an entire generation of consoles to produce a sequel. And finally, that time has come... on the Wii.

Developed by the American branch of Sonic Team (uh oh...), this game continues the spirit of the original NiGHTS, but tacks on some Wii control schemes, voice acting, and additional modes for a good-but-unpolished experience that's at least worth a rental, if not a purchase.
The story revolves around two children - Will and Helen - who are transported to the Night Dimension when they fall asleep. Apparently, an evil entity known as Wizeman is using creatures known as Nightmarens in an attempt to take over, or something like that. His motivations are never really revealed early on in the game, and there are a few twists and turns in the plot along the way, including a startling revelation about NiGHTS him/her/itself. In general though, the story plays second fiddle to the gameplay, which is definitely the star of the show. This gameplay stays true to the original NiGHTS - mostly.

There are seven levels total, plus a hub world. Each is very unique in its design and fun to explore, with 5 stages to each level culminating in a boss fight. The stages that make up each level contain similar goals, such as flying through a certain number of rings, defeating a certain number of enemies, collecting Nightopians along a track in a timed race sequence, etc. The boss battles at the end of each level are both fun and challenging, though if you cannot figure out the boss's weakness quickly it can be easy to run out of time. On a normal boss stage, this really isn't too much of a problem since you can just start the battle over again. However, each level's chase sequence (the first stage in each level, where you have to free NiGHTS from a cage by collecting 3 keys from Nightmarens) climaxes in a 'preview battle' with the level's boss. If you die in this 'preview battle', you have to do the entire chase sequence over again, which can be frustrating. Thankfully, the chase sequences tend to be a lot of fun, so this really isn't much of a problem. More annoying is the fact that you can't skip the in-game cutscenes, ever. Watching the same 2-minute intro sequence each time you mess up on a stage gets old quickly. The platforming segments where you play as the human characters rather than NiGHTS are easily the weakest part of the game, both graphically and otherwise. Speaking of weak points of this game, flying with the Wiimote is next to impossible. Don't even try it. Just hook up a nunchuk or use a Gamecube controller...then the game controls like a...uh...dream. Hehe.

Graphically, the game is a mixed bag. When walking around as the human characters, it's blatantly obvious that most of the textures in the game were designed to be seen far away, from the perspective of NiGHTS. Close up, everything's muddy and blurry, and looks nowhere near as good as a game like Super Mario Galaxy. However, once you begin to fly around as NiGHTS, you begin to appreciate the detail and care that went into each level (my favorite being the City level that contains casino and billiards elements). There's some real care that went into the design of these levels, and I can't underestimate how much fun it is to fly through them. Boss stages are even better. If this game would have had a little more time in development, it could have been a graphical showpiece for the Wii. Instead, it's merely above-average.

There are additional 'bonus features' in the game as well, such as a customized garden where you can keep the Nightopians you save during the adventure (you can also visit other players' gardens if you wish using the Nintendo WFC). But this feature is just as tacked on as the Chao garden in Sonic Adventure 2, and is a mere afterthought to the main game. The other uses of the Nintendo WFC are much better, as the racing levels in particular are a lot of fun to play online. The "battle mode", while interesting in concept (you're flying around on rails, hurling huge spheres suspended in space at your opponent, who is trying to do the same thing to you), does not transfer well to the control methods provided by the game.

Overall, a good first-step for third-party support on the Wii. This is a game that I hope leads to better and more involved sequels, and serves as an excellent jumping board for the rebirth of the franchise. The American branch of Sonic Team has proven me wrong, in that just like Retro Studios, a local developer with the right guidance can do justice to a Japanese-developed franchise. Good job, guys. Next time, don't rush so much and keep the game in development until it's polished!

Rating System: Who needs stars and numbers? I'm all about the otaku emoticons!

*-* = Amazing
^-^ = Good
-_- = Fair
T_T = Poor


Graphics: ^-^
Great when you're up in the air, but lousy when you're down on the ground, this game could have benefited greatly from a little more time in development in order to sort out all the graphical issues. The in-game look of the human children is downright creepy at times, which is just wrong.

Sound: ^-^

NiGHTS speaks! As does everyone else in this game. Some reviewers have claimed that this addition has ruined the game for them, and added additional controversy to the NiGHTS gender debate [Ed. 'He' has no gender, so stop asking], but I disagree and believe it adds production value. Other sounds are straight-out of the original game. The music is exceptionally catchy and of the Enya-meets-Disney variety, created by the one of the original composers from the first game.

Replayability: ^-^

Lots of stuff to do here, along with the additional modes such as the 'My Dream' garden and Nintendo WFC races and battles, there's quite a bit to do here after the adventure ends. Just note that a lot of these features aren't quite as polished as the main adventure, either.

Downloadable Content: n/a

It's a Wii game, and therefore lacks any downloadable content support at this time.

Fun Factor: ^-^

A good game and a step in the right direction for third-party support on Wii. There's a lot to see and do here. The boss battles (particularly Donbalon) are fun and intense, and there is a lot of creativity in the levels. You'll want to keep playing to see what's next!

Overall: ^-^

Good luck Cameron Banga and co.

The '4 Zeldas in 48 hours' crew is going strong. They're currently decoding the maps for the Triforce locations. They've already raised $1000 for Penny Arcade's charity, Child's Play.

Check their progress at:
http://www.cameronbanga.com




Keep it up, guys!

From the Gaijin, Lisa, and Hikari (the cat in the photo)

Angsty Gaijin's Import Report 1: Kingdom Hearts II FM+

Ahh, Kingdom Hearts.

If someone would have told me in 2000 that one of Squaresoft's most successful franchises of the new millennium would star Disney characters interacting with those from the Final Fantasy universe, I would immediately snicker and ask how much they've had to drink. But amazingly enough, the seemingly bizarre marriage of Mickey Mouse, Donald, and Goofy with Cloud, Aerith, and Squall has worked amazingly well - blending universally familiar characters with epic Japanese-style storytelling, and the series has sold millions of copies in its three-game run. It all started with KH1 on the PS2 and continued with KH: Chain of Memories on the GBA. Then the series moved back to the PS2 with Kingdom Hearts 2, known to be one of the best selling titles throughout the lifespan of the system.

Now a year after the Japanese release of Kingdom Hearts 2, director Tetsuya Nomura has put together a "Final Mix" for the Japanese market containing new scenes, items, areas, special features, and more.

American fans may not know this, but there was a cut of the original Kingdom Hearts released in Japan after the domestic release of the first game here in the United States. This cut of the game, called "Kingdom Hearts: Final Mix", contained the English voiceovers, the boss battles added to the US version that were absent from the original Japanese release, and a new, "special" boss fight with (who we find out later to be) Xemnas. This cut of the game was never released domestically in the US.

Just like the first game's re-release, KH2: Final Mix resurrects scenes alluded to by Nomura in interviews that were originally cut due to lack of development time. The game also includes new boss battles with members of Organization XIII thought to be destroyed in CoM. The special hidden "boss" fight this time around has to be seen to be believed (though if you've seen the secret movie at the end of the original KH2, you won't be too surprised by who you'll be fighting.)

But the real star here is not the remixed KH2. Also included in the package is a complete 3D remake of Chain of Memories for the PS2. Yes. You heard that right. A COMPLETE PS2 REMAKE OF CHAIN OF MEMORIES (here titled Re:Chain of Memories), this is the one reason why Square CANNOT ignore a US release for this collection. But before you get too excited, it's time to rain on your parade a bit....

Disappointingly, this remake keeps the format of the original. It's awkward to deal with the camera this time around (it tends to get in the way when fighting), and the fact that you're dealing with a card battle system in a "real" KH game doesn't make a lot of sense when they already have the programming resources to simply scratch the card crap altogether. The battle system plays out like a cross between KH and a card battle game, and enemies can parry your attacks by throwing cards of higher numeric values than the ones in your deck. This gets particularly nasty in boss battles when the game spikes in difficulty. Some of the reaction commands from KH2 have made their way over into this game, however, and their presence is welcomed.

Also, due to how KH:CoM is structured, many of the areas and rooms are bland and lack personality. Not to say that the game is ugly, but the random design of the areas hurts the graphic quality. Being able to find the doors to other rooms is more difficult compared to the GBA version - this is due to the game's transition to 3D and could have been avoided by using customized areas instead of a bunch of generic rooms linked together by doors. It just seems lazy.

The Japanese voice acting for the human characters is wonderful as always, though hearing Donald and Goofy speaking perfect Japanese is something I still can't get over. As someone who does know some Japanese, I can barely understand either of them - but I'm sure native speakers can.

It's also a bit unusual that Nomura chose to dub Re:CoM in Japanese but use the English vocal track for KH2: Final Mix itself. Due to this, some of the new scenes have "spliced together" dialogue from other lines in the script (and sound horrible..."a --- new --- yooooouuu----" ), and other new scenes that couldn't be spliced are missing dialogue entirely, which is a little awkward to say the least.

Importability? Well, it depends. The real reason for getting this collection, aside from getting the chance to fight ALL 13 members of Organization XIII, is Re:CoM. On its own, it can't compare to KH2...but included in the package, it's very much worth it. Two 20+ hour games for one price. However, remember that all the text in KH2:FM will be in Japanese, and CANNOT be changed to English, and the new scenes are of varying quality. Re:CoM is playable without knowing Japanese, but savvy fans aware of the GBA game's storyline aren't getting much new content here.

All I have to say about the possibility of this collection being localized is that Square's fall release calendar for the US appears a little barren at the moment, and there are still an AWFUL lot of people with PS2's who would pick this up for Re:Chain of Memories alone. The remixed KH2 is icing on the cake. And considering all the Disney levels in Re:CoM are not voiced (only the scenes in Castle Oblivion)...not localizing this game would be a crime. [Ed. They didn't localize it for the holidays, and therefore it will most likely remain in Japan forever. Bad Squeenix. No doughnut.]

Bullet Witch review

WHY BULLET WITCH DOESN'T SUCK........ THAT MUCH.

Due to the Xbox 360's less-than-stellar performance over in the Land of the Rising Sun, a lot of the games developed for the system there tend to fall into three categories:

1.) The wacky Japanese game that most people from the US can never possibly understand with the (possible) exception of the Hannah Montana crowd. Case in point: The Idolm@ster. I doubt any self-respecting hardcore gamer could ever get any kind of enjoyment out of a game where the sole purpose is to manage a rising pop star. Oh, and all the downloadable content is different outfits for your pop idol. Joy!

2.) The cross-platform port (otherwise known as the ex-PS3 exclusive). These games are developed by those Japanese companies that realize they can't make back the development costs of their PS3 title by simply selling it as a PS3-exclusive worldwide. They noticed success of some publishers for releasing 360 content in the states, and saw the potential to make up the difference and possibly turn a profit by porting their games to the 360 and releasing them stateside. Famous examples include Devil May Cry 4, Last Remnant, and Virtua Fighter 5. Come on, Square-Enix and Konami, bring the Final Fantasy and Metal Gear Solid love over to the dark side!!! You know you want to. [Ed. (S-E President Yoichi) Wada was just interviewed... the translation is posted at NeoGAF. He expressed subdued Japanese-businessman resentment for Microsoft and basically said in so many words that there will be more or less no additional 360 support - despite S-E's desire to capture more of the Western market, how ironic given the 360's market penetration in the States... In my opinion they could have had a lot of sales this holiday season from localizing Kingdom Hearts II Final Mix + (PS2) rather than relying solely on portables, but that's an editorial for another day...]

3.) Crazy lower-budget action games, generally survival-horror, that provide some sort of gimmick, whether it's fan-service, buckets of blood, or a unique premise/gameplay mechanic. Some notable examples of this category are Vampire Rain and Oneechanbara X. Bullet Witch belongs squarely in the third category, and isn't ashamed to admit it.

The game launched last year at a 'budget price' of $40, though I picked it up for a measly $16 at Circuit City the week after Xmas. It was worth every penny of that $16, but probably not much more than that.The game has a straightforward premise. Demons have taken over the world. You're a witch with demon powers. Go kill stuff.

And honestly, that's pretty much all you do. It's a straightforward third-person shooter with fairly standard controls, weapons, upgrades, and levels. VERY typically horrendous-but-somehow-hilarious voice acting ("I am...Max Cougar") rounds out the package nicely.

Some common complaints with the game: "for the 360, the graphics are sub-par and in many cases look like higher-resolution PS2" ... "Alicia controls too stiffly and it's difficult to cast magic effectively"... "the game is too short" ...etc, etc, etc. Basically reviewers scored it down for being fairly average in more or less every category. Which is pretty much spot-on.

However, there is one thing developer Cavia did not skimp on: Magic. Specifically, the "Ancient Magic" spells (Lightning Bolt, Tornado, and Meteor). If you cast one of these, you better run for your life, because they can cause mass chaos on the levels as buildings, cars, enemies, and more are blown up, destroyed, swept away, and smashed to pieces before your very eyes. Never in my life have I seen a game with so many destructible objects in the environment, and there's something innately fun about being able to (more or less) completely destroy the levels you're playing around in.With a bit more polish, the magic system could have been refined further from a physics standpoint as well as allowing for a little more graphical "flash".

There are a few things that I've found particularly frustrating with the game. First of all, the storyline. The "twist", given how little we know and care about the protagonists of the game, is neither surprising nor effective. It fails. Miserably. Also, repetitive textures in certain areas make it easy to become lost, and the first, second, and last levels rely on the cheap ("kill this enemy to bring down the barrier") gameplay. This wouldn't be so bad except for the fact that it's next to impossible to tell exactly where those barriers are due to the repetitive texturing... But these flaws could be forgiven more than my last complaint: One hit kills. And lots of them. "Conveniently" placed snipers can pop you in the head before you realize what even happened, and the guardians of those barriers I mentioned earlier can fling cars, trucks, tanks, and debris at you faster than you can say "WTF?". There is a dodge mechanic in place, but it doesn't always work. You'll have to replay sections of the game over and over and over again trying to figure out where the snipers are and how to get potential projectiles away from barrier guardians. This is _never_ fun.But overall, I'm fully convinced that the game does not SUCK. As a matter of fact, I've played and enjoyed more of this game than Assassin's Creed. Hehe, I wonder why...[Ed. Because Assassin's Creed sucks - a lot, I couldn't get into it no matter how hard I tried and I sure don't blame EGM for giving it an honest review]

Thanks, Cavia, for delivering a mildly entertaining Japanese-developed 360 romp that's more impressive than most reviews would have you admit. If you can find it cheap, don't feel ashamed to pick it up.

Rating System: Who needs stars and numbers? I'm all about the otaku emoticons!

*_* = Amazing

^-^ = Good

-_- = Fair

T_T = Poor

Graphics: ^-^

Though a lot of people have said in reviews of the game that its visuals are barely above a PS2 title, I disagree. True, there are some framerate issues and the textures can be bland at times, but for a budget title, it looks pretty good overall. The Ancient Magic spells that can blow up just about every structure in the environment are the game's showpieces, hands-down.

Sound: -_-

The voice acting treads that fine line between terribly hilarious and just plain terrible. Max Cougar, buddy, you single-handedly ruined this game for me. One sound effect I did really like was the echo used when Alicia casts a spell. More Japanese games dubbed into English should use similar effects. As for the music, it's so-so...nothing stands out one way or the other.

Replayability: ^-^

It's over pretty quickly, and there isn't a lot of reason to go back through, except to gain achievements and max your character out. Beating the game on Easy will allow you to carry your upgrades over to higher difficulty levels, and some people may get a kick out of that, especially to unlock more achievements.

Downloadable Content: T_T

There's extra outfits, 'cheats', and 'alternate stages' to download. I'm a little hesitant to pay extra money for a remixed stage when there isn't any explanation as to what exactly will constitute a remixed stage... I'd stay away.

Fun Factor: ^-^

A fun diversion when there's nothing else to play. Wreaking havoc on polygonal environments and watching demons get chewed up and spit out by the elemental chaos you craft will get old eventually...but for a while, it's great fun. Especially at a bargain-bin price.

Overall: ^-^